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rainbowfic2012-04-24 11:49 pm
bookblather) wrote in rainbowfic2012-04-24 11:49 pm
Sky Blue Saturation and Blush 14: Valentine's
Author: Kat
Title: Valentine's
Story: In the Heart
Colors: Sky blue saturation, blush 14 (flowers and chocolates) with Isana's paint-by-numbers (Ivy and Gina, on Valentine’s Day.).
Supplies and Materials: Stain (It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. - Antoine de Saint-Exupery), chalk (this picture), glue (You can make real progress simply by remaining true to your values.), glitter (Define what love means to you), graffiti.
Word Count: 3018.
Rating: PG-13.
Summary: Ten Valentine's Days for Ivy and Gina.
Warnings: nope.
Notes: Saturation the first.
1. sky
"Did you know that it's Valentine's Day?" Gina asked idly, tracing a heart on Ivy's breast.
Ivy, who was still a little hungover, blinked, and said, "Is it? I guess it must be. Sorry, it's just Aaron's birthday is the thirteenth so that sort of overshadows Valentine's Day, and..." She trailed off, suddenly aware that she was babbling, and added, "Er, sorry, anyway. I'll do better next year."
Gina's finger paused on her breast, then continued in its path. Ivy wondered, suddenly, if it was a deliberate echo of what she'd done last night. "Next year?" she asked.
"Um." Well, shit. "I... well, I love you. I don't see this ending anytime soon." She looked down, which was a mistake, since all she could see was her legs tangled with Gina's. "I don't want this to end anytime soon. I was sort of hoping I could plan on having another Valentine's."
Gina sat up, her bare breasts soft and warm-looking in the morning light. She looked thoughtfully down at Ivy for a moment, biting her lip in a way that made Ivy's stomach tighten, then said, "I think you would learn to pilot a plane just to write my name in the sky, if you could. Of course you can have another Valentine's."
"Awesome," Ivy said, and pulled Gina down to her again.
2. air
True to her word, Ivy had really gone all-out this Valentine's Day. Or at least, Gina thought, biting her lip to keep back the giggles, she had tried.
The trouble was, Ivy really wasn't a very good cook. She tended to get distracted by the chemical reactions occurring, prolonging cook time until all she had was a panful of ashes, at which point she remembered that it was supposed to be edible. She also had a nasty habit of procrastination that had apparently cost her a bouquet of roses-- though Gina rather preferred the slightly wilted gerbera daisies shoved in a vase.
She stepped forward, heels clicking on the hardwood floor, and rearranged the poor daisies so all the stems were in the water, then glanced around the rest of the room, absently. A heart-shaped box of chocolates, stereotypical but none the less unwelcome for being so. A teddy bear-- but the tag read "Happy Valentine's Day, buttface," so probably was not intended for her.
Ivy came into the room, wiping sweat off her face and carrying a frying pan, and stopped dead when she saw Gina. "Oh, no," she said, and shook the pan at Gina. "You're not supposed to be here yet! I'm not done."
Gina giggled, and stroked the petals of the daisies again. "I got off work early," she said. "What is it you were trying to cook there?"
Ivy glanced ruefully into the pan. "Chicken parmesan."
Gina stripped off her jacket, dropped it on the chair next to the flowers, and took the pan away from Ivy. "Give it to me, I'll finish it." She kissed Ivy's cheek, and added, "Go get dressed in something nice."
Ivy pouted, and made a grab for the pan. "It's my Valentine's Day, I was supposed to make it awesome."
"And you did," Gina pointed out. "It's a two-way street, love. Go put on something nice and let me cosset you for a while." Ivy still looked as if she was hesitating, so Gina added, coaxingly, "I'll let you cosset me again later."
"Oh, all right," Ivy said. "But I'm holding you to that."
3. cloud
Gina made dinner, some kind of salmon souffle that was really good, especially with the buttered mashed potatoes Ivy had learned to make not very long ago. Ivy set the table and lit the candles, pushed everything over by their little window so they could look out and see the lights of the city and the people walking by, hand in hand or arm in arm.
It was a good thing that she'd done that, because so far neither one of them had said anything, and Ivy was pretty sure it wasn’t because they were too busy eating.
"I'm sorry," she said, at last, into the silence. "I shouldn't have snapped at you like that."
Gina sighed, and put down the fork she'd been using to push her souffle around the plate. "It's all right," she said, quietly. "You have every right to be frustrated with me."
"Maybe," Ivy said, "but not to take it out on you. I'm sorry."
"Apology accepted," Gina said, and rubbed her forehead. "My turn; I'm sorry I sounded like I was brushing you off. I just... it's very hard to even think about coming out to my parents."
Ivy made a noncommittal noise, because she did not and could not understand that point of view. She'd been worried about coming out, but the sheer, stark terror Gina seemed to feel at the very thought... no, she couldn't understand that. "It's not really about that," she said. "At least, I don't think it is. It's just... I love you. You love me. I don't like feeling like you're ashamed of that love."
"I'm not," Gina said, and a moment later, emphatically, "I'm not. I'm afraid they won't love me anymore, and I don't... I don't know how I would handle that."
Ivy reached over the table and took both her girlfriend's hands in hers. "It's okay, Gina. It's okay. You do it when you're ready, and I promise never to push you again, all right?"
Gina shook her head, but did not pull her hands away. "No, don't promise that. I... I'll need you to push me, if I'm ever going to do it." She smiled, wanly. "You do such reckless things sometimes. I'll need your courage."
"You have it," Ivy said, and squeezed her hands. "Always."
4. breeze
"How's Olivia?" Ivy asked.
Gina looked up in surprise, the breeze ruffling through her hair. February 14th was unseasonably warm this year, so she and Ivy had taken the now-traditional gerbera daisies and chocolates out to the Cloisters for a picnic. It was still chilly enough that the flowers were curling in on themselves and both of them needed jackets, but that was all right-- the trees were just budding, and it was no hardship to huddle beneath one in the thin winter sunlight and share body heat. "Olivia? She's... she's doing all right. Why do you ask?"
Ivy shrugged. "I don't know. I guess... I just thought of her. Jake was talking about how they used to go out to the Catskills on Valentine's Day."
"He must miss her a lot," Gina said, softly.
"Well, yeah," Ivy said. There was a pause, broken only by the rustling of the few new leaves, then she asked, "Does she miss him?"
Gina considered that for a moment. "She never talks about him, so I think she does, yes."
"I won't even pretend to follow that logic," Ivy said, and sighed. "Promise me you'll never leave me like that."
"Ivy," Gina said, as solemnly and forcefully as she could, "if it is up to me, I will never leave you. Not ever."
Ivy caught up her hand and pressed a kiss to the back. "Good."
5. wind
"I can't believe," Gina said, a few hours later, "that you were going to make the waiters sing."
"Hey, now," Ivy objected mildly. She lifted her head from Gina's bare breasts to look her fiancee-- fiancee!-- in the eyes. "I'll have you know that they're in a barbershop quartet outside of work. That's why I picked that place. Well, that and the chocolate mousse."
Gina smirked, and licked one last smudge of the mousse off her fingers. "Kind of them to let us carry it out, don't you think?"
"Very," Ivy said. "I told you, I had big plans. Singing waters, champagne glass, the ring in the dessert and everything. It was going to be the perfect proposal, and you ruined it." She turned her head a little and kissed the slope of Gina's breast. "Not that I'm horribly broken up about it or anything."
"Showoff," Gina told her, fondly. "That's what you are, a showoff. You just wanted everyone in the restaurant to ooh and ahh over how romantic you are."
Ivy thought about that for a moment. "Well," she allowed, "maybe a little. Mostly I wanted you to ooh and ahh over how romantic I am, though."
"Well, then," Gina said, tilted Ivy's chin up, and kissed her. "Mission accomplished."
"Glad to hear it," Ivy breathed, and kissed her again. "Up for round two, future wife?"
In answer, Gina pushed her over onto the bed.
6. tornado
Ivy had been quiet all day, even a little surly-- unlike her at the best of times, and the more so on Valentine's Day. Gina kept quiet for a bit, hoping she'd come out of it, but she was still quiet when evening came, and Gina was not going to have their traditional night in spoiled.
"Hey," she said, stroking Ivy's arm. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing," Ivy said, unconvincingly.
Gina arched an eyebrow. "You know you can't lie to me anymore. What is it?"
Ivy sighed. "I don't want to ruin the day, Gina."
Gina chewed her lip for a little bit. "Well," she said, at last. "You're not the brightest to be around. Seriously, Ivy, what's wrong?" Ivy hesitated, and she added, "Spit it out."
"Aaron and Clara," Ivy said, at last. "It's... it's just Aaron and Clara."
Ah. Aaron and Clara, who were getting married. Aaron and Clara, who had been engaged for less a month and would be engaged for less than six months more, when today marked the first anniversary of their engagement, and no end in sight. "Oh," Gina said, and pulled Ivy into her arms. "I understand now."
"It's not that I'm jealous," Ivy began, then shook her head. "No, I am. It's not that I don't want them to get married. I just wish..."
"That we could too," Gina finished, softly. "We will, love. Someday."
"Someday," Ivy echoed, but she did not sound certain.
7. storm
The worst lightning storm in living memory hit New York City on the night of February 13th.
Ivy was not quite paralyzed with fear. There had been a time, particularly in her early teens, when she would have been, but now she just jumped every time lightning flashed or thunder rolled, which was pretty much continuously. Now she lay on her side, facing away from the window, her arms wrapped tight around herself as she tried to keep herself from hyperventilating, tried to keep her heart beating at a normal speed instead of fast as a hummingbird.
She wasn't entirely successful.
She'd thought, at least, that she'd been quiet enough to not wake Gina, but her fiancee rolled over sleepily and patted her knee. "Ivy, you all right?"
"Sorry," she managed, through her teeth. "Didn't mean to wake you."
There was a brief rustling sound, then Gina tucked herself up against Ivy's back, tucking one arm under her, stroking the other along the tense muscles in her shoulders. "You didn’t," she said, her voice soothing and soft. "The storm did. Scared?"
"No," Ivy lied. She wasn't sure why she lied-- Gina knew all about her thunderstorm problem-- but she did. "Just can't sleep."
"Of course." Gina kissed her back of her neck. "Who could sleep, in this mess? Did I tell you about this latest book I've got to edit? It's a trainwreck, in the most entertaining way."
Ivy gratefully lost herself in Gina, listening to the soft rhythms of her voice, concentrating on the feel of her hand stroking up and down, once or twice stopping to massage her shoulders. She wasn't really sure what Gina was saying anymore-- she only needed her voice, and her touch, and as long as she had those, she could start, slowly, to relax.
Some time later, she realized with a start that the lightning and thunder had stopped, and the rattling sound was just rain driving against their windows. Just rain, not exactly soothing, but not terrifying, either.
She let out a long breath, and rolled over, wrapping both her arms around Gina's shoulders, tucking her head under Gina's chin. "Thank you," she whispered.
"Of course," Gina murmured, and kissed the top of her head. "Happy Valentine's."
"What?" Ivy twisted around to get a look at their bedside clock, and sure enough, twelve-thirty. "Oh. Wow. I didn't mean to keep you up this long."
"You didn't," Gina said, kissing her head again. "But don't keep me up any longer. We have a big day tomorrow."
Lunch and flowers and chocolate and a show, and afterwards, home and bed and each other's bodies, soft and endless. Ivy closed her eyes. "All right," she said. "I love you. Happy Valentine's."
"Love you too," Gina said. "Now sleep."
8. hurricane
They'd had plans.
A night out on the town, champagne and caviar-- they were going to go all out, because it would have been a historic night. All their friends were going to be there, all of them dressed to the nines. They'd been planning to celebrate into the wee hours, and then go home and celebrate in their own private fashion.
But God laughed when men made plans, and the bill had been defeated less than an hour before they were supposed to leave. Gina thought that she would always remember standing in the doorway, one earring on, her hands frozen while putting the other one in, staring over the couch as the TV announcer, sounding stunned, announced the failure.
Ivy had been sitting on the couch, her hands clasped, her head hanging. Gina had gone to her, earring forgotten. They hadn't moved since.
"I was so sure," Ivy said, into the silence, hours later. "I was so sure."
"We all were," Gina replied.
9. gas
Olivia's pregnancy grew more prominent day by day, now that she was into the third trimester. And while Ivy did not envy her the gas and the bloating and the sore, swollen feet, she only had to look at Olivia's glowing face and the look of stunned happiness Jake had been wearing for months to envy them the baby.
She waved the two of them out, the last guests to depart their Valentine's Day party, then shut the door and turned back to Gina, who was picking up streamers from the living room floor. "Do you want kids?" she asked.
"Yes," Gina said, absently. "I thought we talked about this after we got engaged."
"Yeah, Ivy said, "but I mean, like, now."
Gina looked up at her, a startled expression crossing her face. "What, right now?"
Ivy gave her fiancee a flat look. "Obviously not," she said. "A suitable time for adoption proceedings and/or pregnancy will have to elapse. Also, I'm not getting pregnant."
"That's fine," Gina said. "Have you got baby fever?"
Ivy shrugged. "Maybe? I don't know if it's baby fever or just child fever, though. I want a kid, Gina."
Gina looked down at her hands, twisting a paper streamer between and around her fingers until it broke. "I don't know, Ivy. I always thought... I wanted to be married before we had children. It's certainly easier to adopt that way."
Ivy sighed, and sat down on the sofa's arm. "I know, but... I don't know. It's starting to look like we'll never be able to get married."
"Don't say that," Gina said. "We will get married. It will happen. And then we'll adopt all the children you want."
That wasn't entirely satisfying, but what could Ivy say? "All right," she said, and then added, "But if we still can't get married in five years, then can we have this talk again?" In five years she would be thirty-five, Gina thirty-seven-- more than time to make it happen if they were going to make it happen.
"All right," Gina said, her voice gone absent again.
Ivy hoped she'd been listening.
10. rainbow
"This is going to be our year," Gina said, from her spot in Ivy's lap, watching the club's dance floor heave with dancers and lovers. "I'm sure of it. This is going to be the year they legalize it."
Ivy hummed deep in her chest, and readjusted her arms around Gina's waist. "Does it really matter if they do?" she asked, thoughtfully.
Gina twisted around to look straight into her eyes. "How can you say that?" she demanded. "It matters. It matters so much."
Ivy blinked, as if she hadn't really been aware of what she said. "Oh, I know that," she replied. "Obviously marriage equality is a major and necessary step towards overall equality. It's just... does it matter for us, personally, if we get married or not?" She spread out the fingers of her left hand, splayed them over Gina's to set their engagement rings side by side.
"Ah," Gina said.
Ivy continued as if she hadn't spoken. "You and I... we're in this for good. We've made that commitment to each other. It would be nice to have government recognition, but aren't we more or less already married?"
"More or less," Gina said, "but I want the wedding. I want that ceremony, and that recognition. I don't like people looking at us and thinking we should be ashamed." She took a deep breath, remembering her parents' faces when she'd come out. "I want a day that's for us, when people will look at us and think how happy we are, you and me."
"Hmm." Ivy raised her chin and propped it on Gina's shoulder. "So it's more about other people?"
"Aren't all weddings?" Gina asked. "They're basically big parties thrown so other people can share in the joy. That's what I want. And a commitment ceremony is not the same."
"Okay." Ivy kissed her shoulder, then clasped her hands at Gina's hip. "Then as soon as they make it legal, let's get married."
Gina grinned. "Next Valentine's Day, you'll be my wife. I'm sure of it."
"Next Valentine's Day," Ivy murmured, and smiled.
Title: Valentine's
Story: In the Heart
Colors: Sky blue saturation, blush 14 (flowers and chocolates) with Isana's paint-by-numbers (Ivy and Gina, on Valentine’s Day.).
Supplies and Materials: Stain (It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. - Antoine de Saint-Exupery), chalk (this picture), glue (You can make real progress simply by remaining true to your values.), glitter (Define what love means to you), graffiti.
Word Count: 3018.
Rating: PG-13.
Summary: Ten Valentine's Days for Ivy and Gina.
Warnings: nope.
Notes: Saturation the first.
1. sky
"Did you know that it's Valentine's Day?" Gina asked idly, tracing a heart on Ivy's breast.
Ivy, who was still a little hungover, blinked, and said, "Is it? I guess it must be. Sorry, it's just Aaron's birthday is the thirteenth so that sort of overshadows Valentine's Day, and..." She trailed off, suddenly aware that she was babbling, and added, "Er, sorry, anyway. I'll do better next year."
Gina's finger paused on her breast, then continued in its path. Ivy wondered, suddenly, if it was a deliberate echo of what she'd done last night. "Next year?" she asked.
"Um." Well, shit. "I... well, I love you. I don't see this ending anytime soon." She looked down, which was a mistake, since all she could see was her legs tangled with Gina's. "I don't want this to end anytime soon. I was sort of hoping I could plan on having another Valentine's."
Gina sat up, her bare breasts soft and warm-looking in the morning light. She looked thoughtfully down at Ivy for a moment, biting her lip in a way that made Ivy's stomach tighten, then said, "I think you would learn to pilot a plane just to write my name in the sky, if you could. Of course you can have another Valentine's."
"Awesome," Ivy said, and pulled Gina down to her again.
2. air
True to her word, Ivy had really gone all-out this Valentine's Day. Or at least, Gina thought, biting her lip to keep back the giggles, she had tried.
The trouble was, Ivy really wasn't a very good cook. She tended to get distracted by the chemical reactions occurring, prolonging cook time until all she had was a panful of ashes, at which point she remembered that it was supposed to be edible. She also had a nasty habit of procrastination that had apparently cost her a bouquet of roses-- though Gina rather preferred the slightly wilted gerbera daisies shoved in a vase.
She stepped forward, heels clicking on the hardwood floor, and rearranged the poor daisies so all the stems were in the water, then glanced around the rest of the room, absently. A heart-shaped box of chocolates, stereotypical but none the less unwelcome for being so. A teddy bear-- but the tag read "Happy Valentine's Day, buttface," so probably was not intended for her.
Ivy came into the room, wiping sweat off her face and carrying a frying pan, and stopped dead when she saw Gina. "Oh, no," she said, and shook the pan at Gina. "You're not supposed to be here yet! I'm not done."
Gina giggled, and stroked the petals of the daisies again. "I got off work early," she said. "What is it you were trying to cook there?"
Ivy glanced ruefully into the pan. "Chicken parmesan."
Gina stripped off her jacket, dropped it on the chair next to the flowers, and took the pan away from Ivy. "Give it to me, I'll finish it." She kissed Ivy's cheek, and added, "Go get dressed in something nice."
Ivy pouted, and made a grab for the pan. "It's my Valentine's Day, I was supposed to make it awesome."
"And you did," Gina pointed out. "It's a two-way street, love. Go put on something nice and let me cosset you for a while." Ivy still looked as if she was hesitating, so Gina added, coaxingly, "I'll let you cosset me again later."
"Oh, all right," Ivy said. "But I'm holding you to that."
3. cloud
Gina made dinner, some kind of salmon souffle that was really good, especially with the buttered mashed potatoes Ivy had learned to make not very long ago. Ivy set the table and lit the candles, pushed everything over by their little window so they could look out and see the lights of the city and the people walking by, hand in hand or arm in arm.
It was a good thing that she'd done that, because so far neither one of them had said anything, and Ivy was pretty sure it wasn’t because they were too busy eating.
"I'm sorry," she said, at last, into the silence. "I shouldn't have snapped at you like that."
Gina sighed, and put down the fork she'd been using to push her souffle around the plate. "It's all right," she said, quietly. "You have every right to be frustrated with me."
"Maybe," Ivy said, "but not to take it out on you. I'm sorry."
"Apology accepted," Gina said, and rubbed her forehead. "My turn; I'm sorry I sounded like I was brushing you off. I just... it's very hard to even think about coming out to my parents."
Ivy made a noncommittal noise, because she did not and could not understand that point of view. She'd been worried about coming out, but the sheer, stark terror Gina seemed to feel at the very thought... no, she couldn't understand that. "It's not really about that," she said. "At least, I don't think it is. It's just... I love you. You love me. I don't like feeling like you're ashamed of that love."
"I'm not," Gina said, and a moment later, emphatically, "I'm not. I'm afraid they won't love me anymore, and I don't... I don't know how I would handle that."
Ivy reached over the table and took both her girlfriend's hands in hers. "It's okay, Gina. It's okay. You do it when you're ready, and I promise never to push you again, all right?"
Gina shook her head, but did not pull her hands away. "No, don't promise that. I... I'll need you to push me, if I'm ever going to do it." She smiled, wanly. "You do such reckless things sometimes. I'll need your courage."
"You have it," Ivy said, and squeezed her hands. "Always."
4. breeze
"How's Olivia?" Ivy asked.
Gina looked up in surprise, the breeze ruffling through her hair. February 14th was unseasonably warm this year, so she and Ivy had taken the now-traditional gerbera daisies and chocolates out to the Cloisters for a picnic. It was still chilly enough that the flowers were curling in on themselves and both of them needed jackets, but that was all right-- the trees were just budding, and it was no hardship to huddle beneath one in the thin winter sunlight and share body heat. "Olivia? She's... she's doing all right. Why do you ask?"
Ivy shrugged. "I don't know. I guess... I just thought of her. Jake was talking about how they used to go out to the Catskills on Valentine's Day."
"He must miss her a lot," Gina said, softly.
"Well, yeah," Ivy said. There was a pause, broken only by the rustling of the few new leaves, then she asked, "Does she miss him?"
Gina considered that for a moment. "She never talks about him, so I think she does, yes."
"I won't even pretend to follow that logic," Ivy said, and sighed. "Promise me you'll never leave me like that."
"Ivy," Gina said, as solemnly and forcefully as she could, "if it is up to me, I will never leave you. Not ever."
Ivy caught up her hand and pressed a kiss to the back. "Good."
5. wind
"I can't believe," Gina said, a few hours later, "that you were going to make the waiters sing."
"Hey, now," Ivy objected mildly. She lifted her head from Gina's bare breasts to look her fiancee-- fiancee!-- in the eyes. "I'll have you know that they're in a barbershop quartet outside of work. That's why I picked that place. Well, that and the chocolate mousse."
Gina smirked, and licked one last smudge of the mousse off her fingers. "Kind of them to let us carry it out, don't you think?"
"Very," Ivy said. "I told you, I had big plans. Singing waters, champagne glass, the ring in the dessert and everything. It was going to be the perfect proposal, and you ruined it." She turned her head a little and kissed the slope of Gina's breast. "Not that I'm horribly broken up about it or anything."
"Showoff," Gina told her, fondly. "That's what you are, a showoff. You just wanted everyone in the restaurant to ooh and ahh over how romantic you are."
Ivy thought about that for a moment. "Well," she allowed, "maybe a little. Mostly I wanted you to ooh and ahh over how romantic I am, though."
"Well, then," Gina said, tilted Ivy's chin up, and kissed her. "Mission accomplished."
"Glad to hear it," Ivy breathed, and kissed her again. "Up for round two, future wife?"
In answer, Gina pushed her over onto the bed.
6. tornado
Ivy had been quiet all day, even a little surly-- unlike her at the best of times, and the more so on Valentine's Day. Gina kept quiet for a bit, hoping she'd come out of it, but she was still quiet when evening came, and Gina was not going to have their traditional night in spoiled.
"Hey," she said, stroking Ivy's arm. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing," Ivy said, unconvincingly.
Gina arched an eyebrow. "You know you can't lie to me anymore. What is it?"
Ivy sighed. "I don't want to ruin the day, Gina."
Gina chewed her lip for a little bit. "Well," she said, at last. "You're not the brightest to be around. Seriously, Ivy, what's wrong?" Ivy hesitated, and she added, "Spit it out."
"Aaron and Clara," Ivy said, at last. "It's... it's just Aaron and Clara."
Ah. Aaron and Clara, who were getting married. Aaron and Clara, who had been engaged for less a month and would be engaged for less than six months more, when today marked the first anniversary of their engagement, and no end in sight. "Oh," Gina said, and pulled Ivy into her arms. "I understand now."
"It's not that I'm jealous," Ivy began, then shook her head. "No, I am. It's not that I don't want them to get married. I just wish..."
"That we could too," Gina finished, softly. "We will, love. Someday."
"Someday," Ivy echoed, but she did not sound certain.
7. storm
The worst lightning storm in living memory hit New York City on the night of February 13th.
Ivy was not quite paralyzed with fear. There had been a time, particularly in her early teens, when she would have been, but now she just jumped every time lightning flashed or thunder rolled, which was pretty much continuously. Now she lay on her side, facing away from the window, her arms wrapped tight around herself as she tried to keep herself from hyperventilating, tried to keep her heart beating at a normal speed instead of fast as a hummingbird.
She wasn't entirely successful.
She'd thought, at least, that she'd been quiet enough to not wake Gina, but her fiancee rolled over sleepily and patted her knee. "Ivy, you all right?"
"Sorry," she managed, through her teeth. "Didn't mean to wake you."
There was a brief rustling sound, then Gina tucked herself up against Ivy's back, tucking one arm under her, stroking the other along the tense muscles in her shoulders. "You didn’t," she said, her voice soothing and soft. "The storm did. Scared?"
"No," Ivy lied. She wasn't sure why she lied-- Gina knew all about her thunderstorm problem-- but she did. "Just can't sleep."
"Of course." Gina kissed her back of her neck. "Who could sleep, in this mess? Did I tell you about this latest book I've got to edit? It's a trainwreck, in the most entertaining way."
Ivy gratefully lost herself in Gina, listening to the soft rhythms of her voice, concentrating on the feel of her hand stroking up and down, once or twice stopping to massage her shoulders. She wasn't really sure what Gina was saying anymore-- she only needed her voice, and her touch, and as long as she had those, she could start, slowly, to relax.
Some time later, she realized with a start that the lightning and thunder had stopped, and the rattling sound was just rain driving against their windows. Just rain, not exactly soothing, but not terrifying, either.
She let out a long breath, and rolled over, wrapping both her arms around Gina's shoulders, tucking her head under Gina's chin. "Thank you," she whispered.
"Of course," Gina murmured, and kissed the top of her head. "Happy Valentine's."
"What?" Ivy twisted around to get a look at their bedside clock, and sure enough, twelve-thirty. "Oh. Wow. I didn't mean to keep you up this long."
"You didn't," Gina said, kissing her head again. "But don't keep me up any longer. We have a big day tomorrow."
Lunch and flowers and chocolate and a show, and afterwards, home and bed and each other's bodies, soft and endless. Ivy closed her eyes. "All right," she said. "I love you. Happy Valentine's."
"Love you too," Gina said. "Now sleep."
8. hurricane
They'd had plans.
A night out on the town, champagne and caviar-- they were going to go all out, because it would have been a historic night. All their friends were going to be there, all of them dressed to the nines. They'd been planning to celebrate into the wee hours, and then go home and celebrate in their own private fashion.
But God laughed when men made plans, and the bill had been defeated less than an hour before they were supposed to leave. Gina thought that she would always remember standing in the doorway, one earring on, her hands frozen while putting the other one in, staring over the couch as the TV announcer, sounding stunned, announced the failure.
Ivy had been sitting on the couch, her hands clasped, her head hanging. Gina had gone to her, earring forgotten. They hadn't moved since.
"I was so sure," Ivy said, into the silence, hours later. "I was so sure."
"We all were," Gina replied.
9. gas
Olivia's pregnancy grew more prominent day by day, now that she was into the third trimester. And while Ivy did not envy her the gas and the bloating and the sore, swollen feet, she only had to look at Olivia's glowing face and the look of stunned happiness Jake had been wearing for months to envy them the baby.
She waved the two of them out, the last guests to depart their Valentine's Day party, then shut the door and turned back to Gina, who was picking up streamers from the living room floor. "Do you want kids?" she asked.
"Yes," Gina said, absently. "I thought we talked about this after we got engaged."
"Yeah, Ivy said, "but I mean, like, now."
Gina looked up at her, a startled expression crossing her face. "What, right now?"
Ivy gave her fiancee a flat look. "Obviously not," she said. "A suitable time for adoption proceedings and/or pregnancy will have to elapse. Also, I'm not getting pregnant."
"That's fine," Gina said. "Have you got baby fever?"
Ivy shrugged. "Maybe? I don't know if it's baby fever or just child fever, though. I want a kid, Gina."
Gina looked down at her hands, twisting a paper streamer between and around her fingers until it broke. "I don't know, Ivy. I always thought... I wanted to be married before we had children. It's certainly easier to adopt that way."
Ivy sighed, and sat down on the sofa's arm. "I know, but... I don't know. It's starting to look like we'll never be able to get married."
"Don't say that," Gina said. "We will get married. It will happen. And then we'll adopt all the children you want."
That wasn't entirely satisfying, but what could Ivy say? "All right," she said, and then added, "But if we still can't get married in five years, then can we have this talk again?" In five years she would be thirty-five, Gina thirty-seven-- more than time to make it happen if they were going to make it happen.
"All right," Gina said, her voice gone absent again.
Ivy hoped she'd been listening.
10. rainbow
"This is going to be our year," Gina said, from her spot in Ivy's lap, watching the club's dance floor heave with dancers and lovers. "I'm sure of it. This is going to be the year they legalize it."
Ivy hummed deep in her chest, and readjusted her arms around Gina's waist. "Does it really matter if they do?" she asked, thoughtfully.
Gina twisted around to look straight into her eyes. "How can you say that?" she demanded. "It matters. It matters so much."
Ivy blinked, as if she hadn't really been aware of what she said. "Oh, I know that," she replied. "Obviously marriage equality is a major and necessary step towards overall equality. It's just... does it matter for us, personally, if we get married or not?" She spread out the fingers of her left hand, splayed them over Gina's to set their engagement rings side by side.
"Ah," Gina said.
Ivy continued as if she hadn't spoken. "You and I... we're in this for good. We've made that commitment to each other. It would be nice to have government recognition, but aren't we more or less already married?"
"More or less," Gina said, "but I want the wedding. I want that ceremony, and that recognition. I don't like people looking at us and thinking we should be ashamed." She took a deep breath, remembering her parents' faces when she'd come out. "I want a day that's for us, when people will look at us and think how happy we are, you and me."
"Hmm." Ivy raised her chin and propped it on Gina's shoulder. "So it's more about other people?"
"Aren't all weddings?" Gina asked. "They're basically big parties thrown so other people can share in the joy. That's what I want. And a commitment ceremony is not the same."
"Okay." Ivy kissed her shoulder, then clasped her hands at Gina's hip. "Then as soon as they make it legal, let's get married."
Gina grinned. "Next Valentine's Day, you'll be my wife. I'm sure of it."
"Next Valentine's Day," Ivy murmured, and smiled.
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I think that was when I just up and declared the entire piece excellent. I mean, I still read from beginning to end, because frankly, it was pretty damn excellent, especially the bit with the storm, but Ivy and Gina and their love, that keeps them together, year and year, is the best part.
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Thank you.
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Great job.
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Thank you!