paradoxcase ([personal profile] paradoxcase) wrote in [community profile] rainbowfic2025-06-27 04:44 pm

Techelet #5, Light Black #17 [The Fulcrum]

Name: Clarification
Story: The Fulcrum
Colors: Techelet #5: Tikkun Olam (repairing the world), Light Black #17: Lose
Styles and Supplies: Brushes (June 27 2025: Oblige), Oils (“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened… or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move on.” - Tupac Shakur)
Word Count: 2040
Rating: PG
Warnings: Discussion of slavery
Characters: Setsiana, Sapfita
In-Universe Date: Night of 1912.1.1.2
Summary: Setsiana gets clarifications from Sapfita.


That night, Setsiana found herself in another dream of Sapfita, standing facing Her in the blackness, the glow from behind Her seeming just out of Setsiana’s field of view. Setsiana hesitated; she badly wanted to know Sapfita’s thoughts on the things she’d recently learned, but Qhoroali’s words kept coming back to her, and she was terribly afraid that Sapfita would see nothing wrong with what the priesthood had been doing, or worse, that she would find out that it wasn’t Sapfita at all, and just a figment of her own imagination that had been keeping her company.

At length, she managed to ask: “Do you support this, then? This taking of slaves from across timelines? Was it your idea in the first place?”

“No,” said Sapfita, “and there was a time when I made it my whole purpose to oppose it, but it is not given to me to be able to enact that kind of change in the world by myself. I have given them wisdom in dreams, but so many of them do not fully appreciate what I have to say to them.”

“You always urged me to follow my dreams and join the priesthood. If you knew they were doing such things, why did you tell me to do that? Why would you want me involved in that?”

“It was necessary for you to become a junior priestess, for so many reasons. You learning this secret was necessary, and it would not have happened otherwise. Even in the timelines where you stay with the priesthood after this point and we are cut off from each other, you are doing necessary work in the world. Just being part of an organization that does evil things does not doom you to contribute only to evil causes. You will come to understand your place in those other timelines, some day.”

“There are timelines where I stay?” asked Setsiana, but even as she asked, she could see it — if she had not gone with Qhoroali and didn’t have the knife with her — if she had been a little less primed for violence, or a little less angry… she could see herself going calmly with the priestesses to the dining hall, listening to them justify their actions and promise her boons, and feeling helpless to mount any serious opposition against them. She had spent so much of her life seeing them as unimpeachable authorities and their power over temple matters as absolute. She thought back again to how they had reacted to her. “How could Priestess Chuanyoa be involved in such things?” she asked. Priestess Chuanyoa had always been the nicest person in the temple, and seemed like the person least capable of doing wrong.

“Priestess Chuanyoa has been overseeing and running the process of acquiring new slaves for thirty years as of the last time you saw her,” said Sapfita. “She is considered the foremost expert at operation of the Mirror, after all. She has long since stopped thinking about or wondering if there is anything wrong with what she is doing. It was Priestess Meqhola who felt the weight of wrongdoing when you confronted them, who knew in her heart that you were right. She only learned of this after she became a full priestess, not so many years before you stabbed her, and she was forced into silence because she knew she was trapped. They do not let go of those who make it to the status of full priestess — not ever, for any reason.”

Setsiana thought back to how Priestess Meqhola had been so upset, and had grasped for a hysterical justification, while Priestess Chuanyoa had been calm and unbothered by the accusation. “Then I stabbed the wrong one of them,” she realized. “Is… is Priestess Meqhola alright?”

“She is fine — in all timelines. They were only a few steps away from the pharmacy, her wounds were treated immediately, and she was young and recovered easily. And afterwards, she was allowed to express her true feelings about the slavery, because the others simply attributed those opinions to her experience of being stabbed while participating, and that participation was no longer asked of her. And because she now had an outlet, and was no longer hiding a deep resentment, she became a more pleasant person, and gained friends and supporters from among the younger priestesses, and older juniors. And a few years further down the line, when Priestess Chuanyoa died and a power vacuum formed at Taleinyo, she was ready to step up and bring her own ideas about the practice of slavery to the temple leadership, and then things began to change there. Taleinyo is just one temple in a small town, but every small contribution in every seemingly insignificant place does matter, in the end.”

Setsiana stood there in thought. “I thought of Priestess Chuanyoa as a friend,” she said, “or at least, someone who I could trust. And I thought Priestess Meqhola had it out for me. I was so wrong about them both.”

“It’s not a problem with you specifically. Human intuition is inherently limited; you cannot have my perspective on events and knowledge of every timeline, and every person’s full potential. You can only see how others treat you — and a person’s skill at making you feel comfortable and safe is not always a reliable indicator of their strength of character. It is just a skill that some have developed, and that others have not.”

Setsiana thought about how much Liselye had gotten away with over the course of her captivity entirely due to that skill, compared to Qhoroali, whom she had always instinctively disliked. That brought her back to some of the things that Qhoroali had said to her on the way back to Nwórza. “Qhoroali said that You could destroy timelines,” she said. “Is that actually true? That You could just remove all of the bad timelines, but You choose not to?”

“Has Qhoroali converted you to her style of problem-solving so easily?”

“I don’t know. I mostly just wanted to know how You would respond.”

“Fair enough. Yes, it is mostly true — unlike the power to create, the power to destroy is not particularly special and is something that all of us have, who exist outside of Time, and since I have more fine-grained awareness of the timelines than the others here, I can destroy only particular ones, if I choose to. I could do what Qhoroali wants and simply destroy all of the timelines where the priesthood ever existed, and thereby destroying myself as well, which actually was not always an idea that bothered me, so much, although now I fear to know what might be called to replace me. But she thinks that new timelines will grow in their place, her so-called World To Come; this will not happen. Timelines do not just come into existence by themselves. Creation is a specific, conscious act, and the only being who is capable of it has been locked out of meddling with your universe. And I will tell you that those are not the only timelines with evil in them. Every timeline that exists contains evil, sometimes much more than the ones that Qhoroali wants destroyed, and every timeline also contains goodness. It is not given to me to be a Creator, but I strongly doubt that it is even possible to create something that is truly free of evil. You know of the Cothas god, yes? The one who destroys the universe every year and then recreates it, hoping for one with more goodness and less evil. If I had that power myself, would you have me do the same? Would you have me be that kind of god?”

“No,” said Setsiana. “I still need to think some more about Qhoroali’s plans, but… that seems like such a violent kind of godhood. Is that god real, the way you are? Is some part of that mythology actually true?”

“Most human religions have hit on at least something that’s correct,” said Sapfita. “It is partly true, or, I guess you might say, inspired by a true story, but that story is very difficult to understand for those who are bound by Time, and it has thus changed in the telling.”

Setsiana sat on what might in some way be termed the “floor”, crossing her legs and staring desolately into the blackness. Sapfita came down with her and sat next to her, taking one of Setsiana’s hands in Her own. “I don’t know what to do now,” Setsiana said softly. “Does it matter if I agree or disagree with Qhoroali? What can I even do to sway her one way or the other? I trained to be a priestess, to do research in a temple, but there is nothing left for me there, now, I can’t go back, even if I decided I was ok with the slavery. I don’t have other skills, I don’t have a trade. I can’t even return to the one time and place where there are people I know. You said that my learning about the slavery was necessary, but what it is necessary for? What good am I for anything, now?”

“You will have to find your own way,” said Sapfita. “I’m not going to tell you what you should do — I promised you before that I would not do that again, and I meant it.”

“You told me what to do once,” said Setsiana. “You told me to go with Qhoroali. What is so different about this time?”

“I had to give you an instruction there, because there was no chance that you would do that in any timeline if I did not,” said Sapfita. “This is the only way in which I can affect the events of your world. I do not believe that is the case, here. I believe you will choose the necessary path on your own, in at least some timelines.”

“How do You know that? Can You see my motivations? Maybe You will tell me what do to here, and that will be the reason I do it.”

“…No,” said Sapfita. “It is true, I cannot actually see into your head like that. Maybe you’re right; at this point in the timeline, it may be true that you would not take the necessary steps without prompting. What I need from you now is to simply stay with Qhoroali, and help her with her quest to murder me. It is necessary that she succeed in her goal and eventually fight me. Don’t worry for me, she cannot actually kill me; I have already experienced her attempt in the same way that I have ‘already’ experienced everything that has ever, and will ever, happen to me, and I do not die there, or cease to exist. But it is necessary for her to reach the point where she can try.”

“You’re right,” said Setsiana. “I’m not going to do that in any timeline.”

“I have an important task for you to do. We are going to repair the world together. As I said, I cannot do it alone, and I need you to be my hands, my Fulcrum, my will carried out within the bounds of Time. That will be a long ways in the future from your current perspective, but the very first step in that direction is for you to help Qhoroali.”

“I don’t want to be responsible for grand tasks, or for repairing the world,” Setsiana said, exasperated, pulling her hands away from Sapfita. “I just wanted guidance. I just want to know what to do with myself, for myself, where to go from here. I don’t want to be a Fulcrum, the instrument of a god’s will. It’s hard enough to just be myself.”

“Well, did you have something else in mind for what you were going to do next?”

“…No. That’s why I was asking You.”

“And since you have nowhere else to go, you will probably stay with Qhoroali for the time being, correct?”

“I guess.”

“That will be sufficient. Please, always remember that I love you.”

Setsiana felt herself begin to fall away from the dream, and this time, she was not even that disappointed.
thisbluespirit: (dw - tardis)

[personal profile] thisbluespirit 2025-06-29 08:25 am (UTC)(link)
Ah, this is all very interesting and I remain curious as to where exactly this all goes next!

“Well, did you have something else in mind for what you were going to do next?”

“…No. That’s why I was asking You.”

“And since you have nowhere else to go, you will probably stay with Qhoroali for the time being, correct?”


Heh.
theseatheseatheopensea: Lyrics from the song Stolen property, by The Triffids, handwritten by David McComb. (Default)

[personal profile] theseatheseatheopensea 2025-06-29 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
“Most human religions have hit on at least something that’s correct,” said Sapfita. “It is partly true, or, I guess you might say, inspired by a true story, but that story is very difficult to understand for those who are bound by Time, and it has thus changed in the telling.”

I really liked this part!
bookblather: A picture of Yomiko Readman looking at books with the text "bookgasm." (Default)

[personal profile] bookblather 2025-09-22 02:38 am (UTC)(link)
Oh man, identity crises are the worst, especially when you're physically displaced as well as emotionally. Well written.