himejoshiheart: tbh creature but fictional fanon cowboy man. the endo flag is overlaid over it and if you tell me to kms over that you can eat my entire ass (Default)
himejoshiheart ([personal profile] himejoshiheart) wrote in [community profile] rainbowfic2025-03-12 01:44 pm

I guess it can’t be helped (It’s just a matter of when)

Author: Chibi
Story: emlore (story: emlore tag please!)
Color: Color Spray (disguise self)
Styles and Supplies: graffiti (songfic challenge - song is Water The Roses by FLAVOR FOLEY), diptych + oils ([community profile] lyricaltitles duet fic - Different songs with a shared subject or theme (separation between two people)), gesso + eraser (princess: the hopeful, crystal edition fusion au!) interactive art because i put most of the lyrics (w/ some edits) in there. chiaroscuro
Summary: Em sings a sad song
Wordcount: 1133
Warning: i put some mental illness(tm) in here. heads up for mentions of abuse and queerphobia INCLUDING RAMCOA/brainwashing people into having their own brains work to your whims via abuse!!!!!! em is being very mentally ill and somewhat misanthropic here.


I guess it can't be helped, it's just a matter of when.
Em steps across a rooftop, her wings and tail tailing behind her. Her eyes choke with tears as she sings- her Anthem can be heard for miles around.
"Do you think she'd notice, if I never bloomed again?" She sings. Her arm swings high, her halos shine, one behind her head and one behind each of her transformed self's wings. "As my roots grow tangled, letters rotting on read..."
A crowd builds up, watching a failure sing under the disguise of a perfect True Heir.
The Queen of Mirrors had came to her.
Told her she had power. Was the one to save the world.
And so, the world was doomed. The world was doomed- because Em, alone as she is and must be, the one who single-handedly is the one who can save the world- isn't enough.
"I just close my eyes, and get stuck within my head." A failure of a girl- the heart of a hero who stings at pain but doesn't have the fuel to fight it. Half-a-hero, incomplete. The angel catgirl can do nothing to save the people who she's the only hope of.
Late nights, alone. Em prays to grow- to sow, to become someone outside of the failure she feels she is, outside of the person who can only sit and watch as the world grows colder, crueler.
As people die before her. As children are taught- drilled in to be accepting of cruelty.
As she sings, a child is bent over a teacher's knee and smacked with a ruler. That will teach her to be accepting.
As she sings, another child is collapsed to their knees, alters that were trained like attack dogs tearing them up for daring to think that what happened wasn't ok at all.
As she sings, the world collapses, and people cheer and smile about it. And people make it worse. And people are torn up by their own minds about it. And people laugh and laugh about it. And people who could fix it don't. And people like her wish they could do something.
"It's only four small words that I'm desperate to hear" Em sings. "But I can't be certain if you're always nowhere near." She spins.
She's better than all of the people below her. She's not good enough. Her halos shine as she sings.
"If the sun grew cold, proving all that I fear-" Em grits her teeth and runs to the edge of the rooftop, and yells out her next lyric, tears staining her face. "If I had your blessing, then it all would disappear!" Her wings shake with anger, her halos spin, her teeth are sharp and her ears are flattened. Her tail swishes. "But I feel so stupid cause you feel the same! And when I water the roses I can't trust you to stay!" She stomps her feet, hissing. These people are like sheep- everyone around her is a part of the problem- someone who could have helped things. Could have made it so that the world wasn't so cruel, wasn't so bloodthirsty.
But of course, of course, it's all up to her. The True Heir.
Her body relaxes, her expression shifts back into despair from anger. "So here I say, near the shimmering moon... just a love-struck fool..." She sighs. Her tail swishes. "What do I do but wait for you?" She grits her teeth as she asks.
Late nights inert- her words are unheard as she cries out to the sky. But put on the crown of True Heir, a mask of a 'Perfected Self', and suddenly she at least gives off the appearance of being someone- of being a person worth listening to.
"It’s only four small words that could make me run away." She sings, her melancholy filling the tune. If only someone could tell her, of course- It will be ok- and mean it. No longer a worthless lie meant to calm her, but a truth. Proof the world will change- change from the cruel place that takes children and brainwashes them to hate their neighbors and tear themselves open, alters trained to fight and shatter, to reenact violence and rip dissenters apart. "But those ten small letters never show me their grace." She laughs. The tears are still falling. The people are still watching.
Will they care? Will they care about her pain? Will they care, or will they laugh, or will they just not know how a pathetic girl like her could care so much? Could feel so much?
But feel she does. And she hates it of herself- hates how emotions burn within her like fire.
"And I feel so stupid, 'cause you feel the same." She sings, her wings fluttering. "And when I water the roses, I can't trust you to stay..." She looks down at the people below her, listening to her every word. "So here I lay, under the shimmering moon... Just a lovestruck fool..." She sighs. "What do I do, but wait for you?" Wait for you to do what you never will. Wait for you to move, to do something. To do what you could have done a long time ago.
But of course, Em's alone, wasn't she? The one who was meant to save the world, the only one.
"People come and surely they go." Em sings, shaking her head. "Flowers wilt and surely they grow." She looks up, raises her voice, and her tail swishes as she screams out her next lyric. "Oh my heart, don't spare me the truth! If I bloom, it won't be for you!"
Oh, people came, and quickly they went. Oh, will Em ever grow?
"I guess it can’t be helped," She sneered. "It’s just a matter of when." When will the world end? When will the people die? When will they run out of people to kill? Filthy, filthy queers to slaughter, trans people to drive to suicide and claim it's a natural state, people to break a program into that executes them dead.
(Of course, that last one isn't something anyone can help. Of course, not even Em herself could do anything to stop others from being trained like dogs by their parents like her friend was.)
But it would be nice, if they had moved to help before things got to that point. But it would be nice, if they had done something.
But it would be nice, if they moved to fix things before they had ended up this way.
But if they just won't notice, it's Em's duty to do it herself.
"Oh, my heart, so sure of the truth." She sings, looking at the sheep below her. "If I bloom, it won't be for you."