Screaming loud enough to turn back the wind. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
whatawaytoburn) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
rainbowfic2012-04-05 06:19 pm
whatawaytoburn) wrote in rainbowfic2012-04-05 06:19 pm
Entry tags:
Atomic Tangerine: Deserted
Name: Charley
Story: None
Colors: Atomic Tangerine (Deserted)
Word Count: 486
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: being trapped in the wrong bodyk, self injury
Summary: Sometimes people burn with the need to be something else. Sometimes that burning can be as much of a punishment as it is a blessing.
You can't do this anymore, you can't. You want to, you need to but you don't know if you can.
Your heart races, beats so hard you feel it might explode out of your chest but you know it won't. you know nothing will change, you know your body will not shift, will not morph into anything more than what it is. Any change, any transformation, will not happen in any real way, not in a way that you want at least.
You look at your hands and you can see the fire, can see the burning change of desire and need flicker against your skin. It won't happen though, it won't amount to anything. It never does. You want so badly, you yearn for it but it wont' happen.,
And everyone knows you're on fire. Everyone stays away from you because they can see your flames flicker around your body, wrap you up and make you burn on but it never adds to anything, you are not the phoenix that rises up form the ash. You are left longing, always longing, always wanting but never getting what it is that you need.
And you do need it, need the change, the transformation. You need the fire to turn you to ash so you can rise above i8t. You need the world to let you shift into what you were meant to be.
Because this body is wrong, this body doesn't fit, this body is not meant for you.
But no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, no matter how you carve your skin, no matter how you contort yourself, nothing happens.
You are left sitting in flames, burning away, longing for nothing more than change.
The world stays away from you, deserted you, abandoned you. People steer clear, the an9iamls hiss as you approach. No one wants to be near a burning thing, not like you, not someone who can spread the flames and leave them longing and noth9ing more.
So you walk in a ghost world, a world scattered with the remains of life, the remains of people and places and things. You want to catch them all on fire, send them burning with you but you can't. Your flames are only meant for you and you curse them every day, even though you love them, even though you hope that every night, you will finally have burned enough to amount to something.
Alone, you curl up in y9our bed, let the flames keep you warm and pray.
Pray for the burning to end.
Pray for the moment you get to rise.
Pray for the transformation that you so long for.
Pray for anything, anything at all but what you have.
Story: None
Colors: Atomic Tangerine (Deserted)
Word Count: 486
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: being trapped in the wrong bodyk, self injury
Summary: Sometimes people burn with the need to be something else. Sometimes that burning can be as much of a punishment as it is a blessing.
You can't do this anymore, you can't. You want to, you need to but you don't know if you can.
Your heart races, beats so hard you feel it might explode out of your chest but you know it won't. you know nothing will change, you know your body will not shift, will not morph into anything more than what it is. Any change, any transformation, will not happen in any real way, not in a way that you want at least.
You look at your hands and you can see the fire, can see the burning change of desire and need flicker against your skin. It won't happen though, it won't amount to anything. It never does. You want so badly, you yearn for it but it wont' happen.,
And everyone knows you're on fire. Everyone stays away from you because they can see your flames flicker around your body, wrap you up and make you burn on but it never adds to anything, you are not the phoenix that rises up form the ash. You are left longing, always longing, always wanting but never getting what it is that you need.
And you do need it, need the change, the transformation. You need the fire to turn you to ash so you can rise above i8t. You need the world to let you shift into what you were meant to be.
Because this body is wrong, this body doesn't fit, this body is not meant for you.
But no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, no matter how you carve your skin, no matter how you contort yourself, nothing happens.
You are left sitting in flames, burning away, longing for nothing more than change.
The world stays away from you, deserted you, abandoned you. People steer clear, the an9iamls hiss as you approach. No one wants to be near a burning thing, not like you, not someone who can spread the flames and leave them longing and noth9ing more.
So you walk in a ghost world, a world scattered with the remains of life, the remains of people and places and things. You want to catch them all on fire, send them burning with you but you can't. Your flames are only meant for you and you curse them every day, even though you love them, even though you hope that every night, you will finally have burned enough to amount to something.
Alone, you curl up in y9our bed, let the flames keep you warm and pray.
Pray for the burning to end.
Pray for the moment you get to rise.
Pray for the transformation that you so long for.
Pray for anything, anything at all but what you have.
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