Geena (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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rainbowfic2012-01-08 04:59 am
geena) wrote in rainbowfic2012-01-08 04:59 am
Entry tags:
Heart Gold 12
Author: sunsetsinthewes
Color: Heart Gold 12. There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. - Friedrich Nietzsche
Styles and Supplies: Brush [mordant], Stain, Feathers, Chalk
Word Count: 612
Rating: G
Story: _____; the title of this story is Dreams of Indiana.
Summary: She is dating the love of his life-- funny how something like that can drive two people apart.
Notes: Again, for this canon, not vague! There's plot! This occurs almost immediately after Yes and also briefly mentions the events in Heading East.
***
Jason isn’t what she expects. Not that she’s sure what she expected (him, it’s always been him, it will always be--), but it sure isn’t boring conversation, leers, and one or two determined gropes that slip past her.
“Do you--” They’re standing on her porch, despite her pleading insistence that he shouldn’t walk her to her door, when he begins stammering and shuffling. Her stomach sinks. “Do you want to go out again?”
She almost says no. But then she thinks of him, think of everything they’ve been through, thinks of the way his eyes light up whenever Jason is mentioned, and the icy grip around her heart nearly distracts her from the sound of her own voice. “Sure, I’d love to.”
Jason smiles, a genuine smile that reaches his eyes. “Really? That’s-- really? We could, uh, we could go to a movie, or--”
“Yeah, whatever, that’s fine.” She glances back toward the dark living room window, pulse speeding up. “Look, I really should go.”
“Huh? Oh, right. I’ll call.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I’ll call,” he repeats firmly, right before leaning in for a kiss that meets her unaware.
When she enters the silent house, she’s careful to remove her shoes and avoid the three squeaky stairs, holding her breath as she passes their closed door. She makes it to her bedroom without waking them, sinking onto the bed in relief.
The night, she tries to fall asleep before the thoughts can catch up with her. She doesn’t succeed.
***
“Jason?” His voice is tinny through the phone her mother brought into her with marked displeasure. She can’t even scold him about the time, not now that she knows he knows. “Of all-- Jason?”
“He asked me. Last week. I thought--”
“How could you?” he whispers, and her spirit breaks once more. “How could you? You knew.”
“I--”
“Don’t. I don’t even want to see you right now.”
She hates everything she stands for.
***
In that vein, things continue for nearly three weeks. They avoid each other. When the bags reappear under her eyes or a bruise appears on his, they pretend not to see. She spends more time in Jason’s company, and to her surprise, she finds herself enjoying their dates for reasons entirely unrelated to revenge. Jason treats her well, like a normal guy would, like she’s worth the flowers and affection and manners.
A person can change a lot in three weeks. She certainly does.
***
“Why are you still doing this?” He confronts her one evening, announcing himself with pebbles against her window in the same painful rhythm. “Please, you have to stop.”
“Because you love him?”
He nods, eyes on the floor. “Because I love him.”
She can’t help asking. “But why? He’s not innocent in this. He knows that he hurt you-- how he hurt you-- and he doesn’t care.”
“I-I can’t hate him.”
“But you can hate me?”
Neither of them breathe.
I’m sorry, she thinks, I’m sorry for starting this. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry that I can’t end this, not now that I’ve had a taste of something good and real that’s just for me. “Get out,” she eventually tells him instead, weary in a way she hasn’t felt for years.
He does, and that view of him as he jumps the fence separating her yard from the road is the last she sees of him for months.
She has never felt so alone.
That night, she dreams of Indiana.
***
sunsetsinthewesColor: Heart Gold 12. There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. - Friedrich Nietzsche
Styles and Supplies: Brush [mordant], Stain, Feathers, Chalk
Word Count: 612
Rating: G
Story: _____; the title of this story is Dreams of Indiana.
Summary: She is dating the love of his life-- funny how something like that can drive two people apart.
Notes: Again, for this canon, not vague! There's plot! This occurs almost immediately after Yes and also briefly mentions the events in Heading East.
***
Jason isn’t what she expects. Not that she’s sure what she expected (him, it’s always been him, it will always be--), but it sure isn’t boring conversation, leers, and one or two determined gropes that slip past her.
“Do you--” They’re standing on her porch, despite her pleading insistence that he shouldn’t walk her to her door, when he begins stammering and shuffling. Her stomach sinks. “Do you want to go out again?”
She almost says no. But then she thinks of him, think of everything they’ve been through, thinks of the way his eyes light up whenever Jason is mentioned, and the icy grip around her heart nearly distracts her from the sound of her own voice. “Sure, I’d love to.”
Jason smiles, a genuine smile that reaches his eyes. “Really? That’s-- really? We could, uh, we could go to a movie, or--”
“Yeah, whatever, that’s fine.” She glances back toward the dark living room window, pulse speeding up. “Look, I really should go.”
“Huh? Oh, right. I’ll call.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I’ll call,” he repeats firmly, right before leaning in for a kiss that meets her unaware.
When she enters the silent house, she’s careful to remove her shoes and avoid the three squeaky stairs, holding her breath as she passes their closed door. She makes it to her bedroom without waking them, sinking onto the bed in relief.
The night, she tries to fall asleep before the thoughts can catch up with her. She doesn’t succeed.
***
“Jason?” His voice is tinny through the phone her mother brought into her with marked displeasure. She can’t even scold him about the time, not now that she knows he knows. “Of all-- Jason?”
“He asked me. Last week. I thought--”
“How could you?” he whispers, and her spirit breaks once more. “How could you? You knew.”
“I--”
“Don’t. I don’t even want to see you right now.”
She hates everything she stands for.
***
In that vein, things continue for nearly three weeks. They avoid each other. When the bags reappear under her eyes or a bruise appears on his, they pretend not to see. She spends more time in Jason’s company, and to her surprise, she finds herself enjoying their dates for reasons entirely unrelated to revenge. Jason treats her well, like a normal guy would, like she’s worth the flowers and affection and manners.
A person can change a lot in three weeks. She certainly does.
***
“Why are you still doing this?” He confronts her one evening, announcing himself with pebbles against her window in the same painful rhythm. “Please, you have to stop.”
“Because you love him?”
He nods, eyes on the floor. “Because I love him.”
She can’t help asking. “But why? He’s not innocent in this. He knows that he hurt you-- how he hurt you-- and he doesn’t care.”
“I-I can’t hate him.”
“But you can hate me?”
Neither of them breathe.
I’m sorry, she thinks, I’m sorry for starting this. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry that I can’t end this, not now that I’ve had a taste of something good and real that’s just for me. “Get out,” she eventually tells him instead, weary in a way she hasn’t felt for years.
He does, and that view of him as he jumps the fence separating her yard from the road is the last she sees of him for months.
She has never felt so alone.
That night, she dreams of Indiana.
***
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Great job.
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How in the world do you cram so much information into such small spaces? It's breathtaking, really.
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Your last line has put such a smile on my face, because, well, that's a wonderful comment and exactly what I wanted to do.
Thank you.
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And you are so welcome. I think that's one of the most admirable qualities a writer can have.
Also, if I had written this, it would have been at least three times as long and ten times less potent.
Keep up the awesome!
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It's not a good situation, that's for sure, and it's only going to get worse. But I'm glad you're enjoying it already.
Thank you!
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Thank you!
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Thank you!
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This is so awful of her, but almost painfully understandable. I feel awful for him, too, and completely understand him leaving her behind. She deserves it.
Great job, and so painful and sad.
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One of the few times Indiana is worthwhile. :p
Thank you!