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rainbowfic2013-03-07 10:45 pm
dark_kana) wrote in rainbowfic2013-03-07 10:45 pm
Alice Blue 11 - Acantus 20 - Fingerpainting - Eraser
Name: Kana
Title: Believe me
Story: Circle Never Ends
Characters: Freya, Nick
Colors: Alice Blue 11. if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you - Acantus 20. Candlestick
Supplies and Styles: Fingerpainting - Eraser
Word count: 1188
Rating: PG
Warning: transphobia
Summary: Takes place before Freya and Nick are a couple
Notes: Constructive criticism is, as always, welcome
Written when I read the Oils prompt I’m fine (I’m not fine) from a while ago. Just forgot to update it that day. *sweatdrop*
"Hey."
Freya turns around when she hears the familiar voice behind her. Seeing Nick walk over to her. She smiles back at him - she'll never tell him she thinks he looks dashing in that white training kimono, his gi, and the black belt around his waist - lifting her arms the moment he is close enough and wrapping them around his neck. Tiptoeing a little because of the difference in height. Of course his arms immediately return the hug. His lips softly brushing her cheek.
"How are you?"
She loses her hold when she asks, raises her eyebrows when he does not let go of her.
"Nick?"
There is worry in her voice - they can both clearly hear it - and still he does not answer, just tightens his hold on her. Freya quickly shifts her position, letting her arms circle around his waist so she doesn't have to tiptoe anymore. Her head resting against his chest and she can hear his heartbeat. Steady. As always... She wonders what is wrong.
He lets go of her when they hear the others walking in. Sees, oh so clearly, the worry in her eyes.
"Hey Nick. Hey Freya."
They greet the others back and she is surprised at how close he stays. Not leaving her side. His fingers gracing her own. Not quite taking her hand is his. And she's too shy to do it herself.
"Nick?"
The others are having a busy conversation and are not paying attention. She's pretty sure it is the only reason he answers her unspoken question.
"I'm okay. But are you?"
She looks at him in wonder. Eyes widening when he sees the concern on his face. Wondering how their roles got suddenly reversed.
"Sure, why wouldn't I be?"
There is genuine wonder in her voice and still, deep down, she knows exactly what he's talking about. Knows what he means.
"Are you really? Because your smile does not reach your eyes. And..."
Sensei calling them on the tatami for training to start, makes him stop. And Freya is, secretly, a little grateful for the interruption. She doesn't react to it any further and he doesn't ask, doesn't push. But he never leaves her side throughout the entire training.
-
"I'm going to regret asking this, but... Want to come over for a drink?"
Nick smiles, knows that she doesn't mean regretting his company, knows she's only referring to his concern and his question at the beginning of training.
"I'd like to... But not if it makes you uncomfortable or sad or..."
Freya shakes her head, placing her fingers against his lips. He can feel how she's trembling.
"Come in."
He quickly puts the lock on his bike before following her inside.
"Gosh, I love your couch."
She laughs when she sees him set himself comfortable. His legs pulled up beneath him. She walks over to the table, lightning the small candles that always stand there. She likes the calming effect the flames give her, how they make the shadows play on the wall when it gets dark outside.
"What can I get you?"
Nick simply shrugs and it's all the answer she needs. It doesn't matter. Whatever you're having. She comes back two minutes later with 2 glasses of grapefruit juice and sets herself down next to him. Wanting nothing more but to let her head rest against his shoulder. And feel his arms around her, holding her close and safe.
"Are you alright?"
Freya closes her eyes for a second and takes a deep breath.
"I am. Sort of. I just... I thought I managed to put something behind me. I thought I was over it. But now I discover it still manages to hurt me. And you know how I feel about myself. You know my self-confidence..."
Startled she looks down when she feels Nick place his hand over hers. Misses how his eyes flash when he hears her last words.
“Want to talk about it? Can I help?”
Smiling sadly she shakes her head.
“No, this is something I have to do by myself. As for talking. I’m not sure if I could. It were words that got me hurt in the first place. But thanks for asking.”
Her gaze travels outside and she’s only a little surprised when he doesn’t pull back. Without looking at him, she turns her hand around – hand palm up – holding his hand in hers. Smiles when she feels his fingers close around hers.
Freya knows he is still worried. Knows he is wondering what has hurt her so – what has been said that hurt her so. But she can’t tell him. She has never told anyone. It seems such a silly reason to still be so upset, to still feel as if she's worth nothing…
"We can't stay friends with you. If we hang out with you, we'll never be accepted with the popular ones."
Balling her hands to fists, not minding how her nails dig in her skin. Not sharp enough to draw blood. But the pain distracts her from the other feelings. The hurt at their words, the doubt about herself… She still sees herself standing there. Alone. Always alone.
”Did it hurt? The operation from guy to girl? I must say, it really did fail…”
She closes her eyes, not wanting to hear any more of the insults. Not wanting to remember the cruel laughter, the looks they shot her when she passed.
“Hey.”
His soft, worried voice. His hand that gently squeezes hers. It makes her look at him again. She smiles reassuringly, knows that she fails.
“Want a hug?”
Freya chuckles while she nods. It makes Nick wonder why she laughs. Until he looks in her eyes. Until he sees the tears shimmering there.
Quickly he inches closer, wrapping his arms around her.
“No need to hide girl…”
He feels how she stiffens in his arms. Only for a second. Startled by his words.
Freya swallows, bites back the tears. She doesn't want to cry... Even though she knows he will not judge her, will not reprimand her, will not laugh with her. He understand. Understands her like few other people do.
"Do you trust me?"
Surprised she looks up at him, not entirely letting go of the embrace just yet.
"Of course I trust you."
Her voice is a little reprimanding.
"Then have a little more faith in yourself. No matter what has happened before, what has been said. No matter what will happen still... You are a great person. And you have people around you who love you and accept you for who you are and who believe in you."
She stays silent. Just watches him. Feels once again how the tears are ready to spill.
"You believe in me, don't you?"
Freya just nods, not yet able to say anything.
"Well, believe in yourself then. Because I believe in you."
He leans forward and kisses her cheek before hugging her again. And this time the tears do escape. Nick gently rubs her back, making soothing noises. Holding her. Just holding her, even when she stops crying.
Title: Believe me
Story: Circle Never Ends
Characters: Freya, Nick
Colors: Alice Blue 11. if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you - Acantus 20. Candlestick
Supplies and Styles: Fingerpainting - Eraser
Word count: 1188
Rating: PG
Warning: transphobia
Summary: Takes place before Freya and Nick are a couple
Notes: Constructive criticism is, as always, welcome
Written when I read the Oils prompt I’m fine (I’m not fine) from a while ago. Just forgot to update it that day. *sweatdrop*
"Hey."
Freya turns around when she hears the familiar voice behind her. Seeing Nick walk over to her. She smiles back at him - she'll never tell him she thinks he looks dashing in that white training kimono, his gi, and the black belt around his waist - lifting her arms the moment he is close enough and wrapping them around his neck. Tiptoeing a little because of the difference in height. Of course his arms immediately return the hug. His lips softly brushing her cheek.
"How are you?"
She loses her hold when she asks, raises her eyebrows when he does not let go of her.
"Nick?"
There is worry in her voice - they can both clearly hear it - and still he does not answer, just tightens his hold on her. Freya quickly shifts her position, letting her arms circle around his waist so she doesn't have to tiptoe anymore. Her head resting against his chest and she can hear his heartbeat. Steady. As always... She wonders what is wrong.
He lets go of her when they hear the others walking in. Sees, oh so clearly, the worry in her eyes.
"Hey Nick. Hey Freya."
They greet the others back and she is surprised at how close he stays. Not leaving her side. His fingers gracing her own. Not quite taking her hand is his. And she's too shy to do it herself.
"Nick?"
The others are having a busy conversation and are not paying attention. She's pretty sure it is the only reason he answers her unspoken question.
"I'm okay. But are you?"
She looks at him in wonder. Eyes widening when he sees the concern on his face. Wondering how their roles got suddenly reversed.
"Sure, why wouldn't I be?"
There is genuine wonder in her voice and still, deep down, she knows exactly what he's talking about. Knows what he means.
"Are you really? Because your smile does not reach your eyes. And..."
Sensei calling them on the tatami for training to start, makes him stop. And Freya is, secretly, a little grateful for the interruption. She doesn't react to it any further and he doesn't ask, doesn't push. But he never leaves her side throughout the entire training.
-
"I'm going to regret asking this, but... Want to come over for a drink?"
Nick smiles, knows that she doesn't mean regretting his company, knows she's only referring to his concern and his question at the beginning of training.
"I'd like to... But not if it makes you uncomfortable or sad or..."
Freya shakes her head, placing her fingers against his lips. He can feel how she's trembling.
"Come in."
He quickly puts the lock on his bike before following her inside.
"Gosh, I love your couch."
She laughs when she sees him set himself comfortable. His legs pulled up beneath him. She walks over to the table, lightning the small candles that always stand there. She likes the calming effect the flames give her, how they make the shadows play on the wall when it gets dark outside.
"What can I get you?"
Nick simply shrugs and it's all the answer she needs. It doesn't matter. Whatever you're having. She comes back two minutes later with 2 glasses of grapefruit juice and sets herself down next to him. Wanting nothing more but to let her head rest against his shoulder. And feel his arms around her, holding her close and safe.
"Are you alright?"
Freya closes her eyes for a second and takes a deep breath.
"I am. Sort of. I just... I thought I managed to put something behind me. I thought I was over it. But now I discover it still manages to hurt me. And you know how I feel about myself. You know my self-confidence..."
Startled she looks down when she feels Nick place his hand over hers. Misses how his eyes flash when he hears her last words.
“Want to talk about it? Can I help?”
Smiling sadly she shakes her head.
“No, this is something I have to do by myself. As for talking. I’m not sure if I could. It were words that got me hurt in the first place. But thanks for asking.”
Her gaze travels outside and she’s only a little surprised when he doesn’t pull back. Without looking at him, she turns her hand around – hand palm up – holding his hand in hers. Smiles when she feels his fingers close around hers.
Freya knows he is still worried. Knows he is wondering what has hurt her so – what has been said that hurt her so. But she can’t tell him. She has never told anyone. It seems such a silly reason to still be so upset, to still feel as if she's worth nothing…
"We can't stay friends with you. If we hang out with you, we'll never be accepted with the popular ones."
Balling her hands to fists, not minding how her nails dig in her skin. Not sharp enough to draw blood. But the pain distracts her from the other feelings. The hurt at their words, the doubt about herself… She still sees herself standing there. Alone. Always alone.
”Did it hurt? The operation from guy to girl? I must say, it really did fail…”
She closes her eyes, not wanting to hear any more of the insults. Not wanting to remember the cruel laughter, the looks they shot her when she passed.
“Hey.”
His soft, worried voice. His hand that gently squeezes hers. It makes her look at him again. She smiles reassuringly, knows that she fails.
“Want a hug?”
Freya chuckles while she nods. It makes Nick wonder why she laughs. Until he looks in her eyes. Until he sees the tears shimmering there.
Quickly he inches closer, wrapping his arms around her.
“No need to hide girl…”
He feels how she stiffens in his arms. Only for a second. Startled by his words.
Freya swallows, bites back the tears. She doesn't want to cry... Even though she knows he will not judge her, will not reprimand her, will not laugh with her. He understand. Understands her like few other people do.
"Do you trust me?"
Surprised she looks up at him, not entirely letting go of the embrace just yet.
"Of course I trust you."
Her voice is a little reprimanding.
"Then have a little more faith in yourself. No matter what has happened before, what has been said. No matter what will happen still... You are a great person. And you have people around you who love you and accept you for who you are and who believe in you."
She stays silent. Just watches him. Feels once again how the tears are ready to spill.
"You believe in me, don't you?"
Freya just nods, not yet able to say anything.
"Well, believe in yourself then. Because I believe in you."
He leans forward and kisses her cheek before hugging her again. And this time the tears do escape. Nick gently rubs her back, making soothing noises. Holding her. Just holding her, even when she stops crying.
no subject
♥ ♥ ♥ for that couch! Really!
-”Did it hurt? The operation from guy to girl? I must say, it really did fail…”-
That is so cruel! *Wants to seriously harm those who said it*
I'm glad Nick is there to hug her and to boost her confidence a little.
no subject
*mod hat on* Would you please add a warning for transphobia? Thank you. *mod hat off*
no subject
It was cruel. It still hurts sometimes. *You have my permission if ever you meet him. In fact, if you do, call me, I'll come and help...*
Getting support when needed. It's what BFF are for? ^^
no subject
Thank you for pointing it out. It has been added.