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rainbowfic2012-05-19 07:21 pm
shadowsong26) wrote in rainbowfic2012-05-19 07:21 pm
Emerald #11, TARDIS Blue #22, Dogwood Rose #8
Story: What You Want
'Verse: Feredar
Colors: Emerald #11. There is no good or evil: only power and those too weak to seek it., TARDIS Blue #22. The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa the bad things don’t always spoil the good things and make them unimportant., Dogwood Rose #8. coral: desire
Supplies and Materials: portrait, mixed media, canvas (Amassa, his wife and children, Ineku, Isshiri, Riluke, and Kirana), frame (Kesshare, Nolani, postwar), oils, feathers, chalk, yarn, glitter ("Make a list of things you want."), novelty beads ("Fresh Blood", The Eels; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4Qp1TEKswQ&ob=av2e)
Word Count: 5084
Rating: R
Characters: Amassa and his wife and children, Kesshare, Ineku, Nolani, Isshiri, Kirana, Lonura
Warnings: References to the events of Sending a Message, character death (violent and nonviolent), implied disowning, implied murder, implied sex with consensual BDSM, arranged/forced marriage, glee at a familial death, references to parental death, stigma towards bastards, use of a sexist slur, war viewed from a distance, references to infertility, implied homophobia, violence towards children
Notes: Constructive criticism welcome, as always. My last Emerald prompt. These are organized in an attempt to have them flow musically into one another. I don't know exactly how well it worked, but that was the goal. Image sources for the covers: front, back. This took for-freaking-ever and is why I haven't posted anything in the last week or so. ...This and end-of-semester type stuff.
Download here
1. Amassa's Wife and Children
Protège-moi--Placebo
Sommes-nous les jouets du destin
Souviens-toi des moments divins
Planant, éclatés au matin
Et maintenant nous sommes tous seuls
960 FY
Queen Lesshura sighed faintly, watching her middle son. "No. We're not doing that."
"Mother, this is the first time Lidare will be home for our birthday in years," he pleaded. "And both of us are so far down in the succession that it hardly--"
"You may not leave the country, and that's final. And don't try going over my head to your father," she cut him off. "I've already spoken to him and he agrees with me."
He pouted. "Just to the mountains, not even over the border, please?"
Lesshura closed her eyes and counted to ten. "Your father wants you both here. I'm sorry."
976 FY
Ulore snarled something obscene under his breath. That bitch Kesshare was planning something, he just had no idea what. The others agreed with him--Lidare told him to stay out of it, quiet spineless priestess that she was. Mina wanted him to wait before acting, wait until they knew more. She and Odaki had the most to lose, she with her husband and he with his brat.
But Ulore couldn't stand for that. He might have the least to lose of all his siblings, being the youngest and unattached to either person or temple, but he sure as hell wasn't going to let that bitch Kesshare walk all over him.
And she needed to know that.
Ulore felt a little sick inside at what occurred to him. That bitch Kesshare had kids, and he was sure they figured into whatever move she was planning. Going for one of them would be the most disruptive, would buy him and his siblings a little time.
The problem was, he actually liked the kids, sort of, as much as he liked any kids or anyone connected with that bitch Kesshare. And the only one likely to be alone was Isshiri, and he was like six or something.
Ulore closed his eyes. It's down to my family or hers. And I have to go with mine.
979 FY
Crown Princess Minalu smiled at the note her husband had left on her vanity that morning. He liked little sweet gestures like that, made a point of making them as often as he could. He seemed to feel a need to prove that he hadn't married her just for her rank.
Not that she'd ever thought he had, but such things mattered to him.
She folded the note up and slipped it up her sleeve and stepped out the door.
She made it three steps before the floor gave way beneath her.
982 FY
It had been getting steadily worse for months, the disorientation. Lidare had to make every move slowly, so slowly or risk falling. There were some days she was too dizzy even to get up.
So far, she'd managed to keep it from her father and brother--living here at the temple helped, and her fellow priests and priestesses had agreed, if reluctantly, to keep her condition secret--but she knew she couldn't much longer. Especially since she was expected in the capital next month for an extended visit.
She closed her eyes, bracing herself against her doorframe and waiting for the room to settle itself around her. Dear gods, please let me be well at home.
985 FY
Odaki was smiling as he left his meeting with his father. The two of them worked well together, had settled into a comfortable rhythm in the six years since he'd become Crown Prince. He was sure that he would be a good King when the time come--though, hopefully, if there was any luck in the world, that wouldn't be for many, many years.
He had married, six months ago, because he'd had to--a forward-going succession was always more stable than a sideways one. And if he outlived his cousin Kesshare, her children were still a few steps away from the throne. If only Riluke could...
But that would never be.
He sighed. At least Riluke and the half-siblings he hoped she would have before too long would be distant enough in age that they were unlikely to feel any kind of sibling rivalry.
Or, at least, he devoutly hoped so.
2. Kirana
World Without End--Bernstein
World without end
Whispers of living, echoes of warning
Patterns of laughter at the edges of mourning
World without end spins endlessly on
979 FY
Kirana dreams of a time of darkness and despair.
She can't quite put what it is that the dream is into words, only knows that very bad things are coming. They're far enough out that she can't say exactly when they’ll come true, so she doesn't share the dreams the way she usually does.
But there is a man in the shadows, with blood on his hand. A sparkling-eyed lady laughs and laughs at the slaughter. A dark woman and the man who is as opposite to her as can be forge a pathway through the destruction.
And Kirana's beloved brother Isshiri is crying.
She is very, very glad that she almost never sees those dreams.
3. Ineku
Bad Romance--Lady Gaga
I want your drama
The touch of your hand
I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand
I want your love
963 FY
Ineku woke before Kesshare the morning after their wedding. He stretched carefully, not wanting to disturb her.
He wondered how long they'd been asleep--the air still smelled of smoke and sex, so it couldn't have been too long.
He didn't try to wake her, though he probably could have and a part of him wanted to oh how I want to but...
The arrangement he and Kesshare had made had been one that utterly mystified his family, especially his brother. Kesshare was known to like fire- and blood-sports in her bedroom play, and, more importantly, the children wouldn't be Loquelin. In most families--at least in his part of Glass--extended family duties and relationships went to both families, even if the poorer or lower-ranked partner married into the wealthier one's family and took that family name. As Utoki had pointed out repeatedly since Ineku had accepted Kesshare's proposal, between the distance, and the royalty, and the magic...there wouldn't be much of a bond between them and their Loquelin relatives.
Ineku sighed. He had known it would never be easy, married to a woman like Kesshare, but he knew he would never be happy with anyone else.
4. Riluke
I'm Still Here--Treasure Planet
I am a question to the world,
Not an answer to be heard.
All a moment that's held in your arms.
985 FY
The house Riluke been given for her residence while representing her grandfather here in the Islands was amazing, in its way. She'd been here three days, and she still felt startled every time she opened her eyes in the morning, or walked in from outside, at the sheer amount of wood there was. Wood paneling, wood furniture, wooden ornaments and moldings...a house like this, back home, would cost more than even her grandfather was worth.
But it was different here. There were trees everywhere, it seemed.
Riluke smiled to herself. It was beyond her wildest hopes, from when she'd had to leave home. Everything was turned on its head here. What was precious beyond imagining at home was a readily available--if still vital and therefore valuable--building material here. And at home, she was an extra family member, ineligible for any sort of real power. Here? Here she was one of the most powerful women in the country by virtue of that same exact position.
But, then, it wasn't just here that that was true. Kesshare and her grandfather had to choose to send her here. Like Isshiri, through no fault of her own, she was valueless to the family in any traditional sense.
Riluke's smile widened, as she traced the graceful curve of one of her bedposts, feeling the way wood had a different smoothness from the glass she was used to.
Like the wood, she was worthless in one place and priceless in another. Like Isshiri, in having no value, her worth was incalculable.
And like both and neither of them, she knew exactly how to capitalize on her value. Riluke had absolutely no interest in trying to take the throne from her cousins. But that didn't mean she had any intention of being a lesser power in the world. And here, in the Islands, with their beautiful, plentiful wood...
Here she had a chance.
5. Nolani
Too Much--Spice Girls
Too much of something is bad enough,
But something's coming over me to make me wonder,
If too much of nothing is just as tough,
I need to know the way to feel to keep me satisfied.
993 FY
Nolani had been in Feredar for three days, but she had yet to speak to her prospective husband. They had an odd custom here, where, no matter how close they were or how they'd come to be engaged, a married couple couldn't see one another for a week before the wedding. The people handling most of the planning would have much preferred it if she hadn't arrived until the morning of the Event, but she'd of course left plenty of extra time for her trip in case of weather or trouble with blocked mountain passes or in the still-not-quite-settled countryside. However, as luck would have it, she'd ended up travelling much faster than expected. So they could just deal with her being early.
But she wished she could've seen or spoken to or even written to Andrell--apparently letters were also Not Done--because the longer she stayed cooped up in here the more afraid she was of the wedding tomorrow.
Not because there was a very good chance someone would try very hard to kill her or Andrell or both. Not even because Isshiri was here and might get caught up in the crossfire.
It was stupid--there was no way in the universe Andrell could back out of the wedding and not show up--but since she and Lony had fought over the wedding and they weren't together anymore...
Nolani was afraid of being alone.
6. Kesshare
Everybody Loves You Now--Billy Joel
All the people want to know your name
Soon there will be lines outside your door
Feelings do not matter in your game
Yeah, 'cause nothing's gonna touch you anymore
997 FY
Kesshare was roused from a sound sleep well before dawn one night in the hottest part of the year. "What is going on?" she asked. "Is the palace under attack?"
"No, Lady," the guard said. He knelt on the glass floor and presented her with a wrapped package.
This is it, she thought. All I've worked for all these years. Slowly, with no trace of shaking in her hands, she unfolded the cloth.
And there it was, in all its pristine, unaffected glory.
The clear-glass circlet of the Monarch.
"How did it happen?" she asked, without looking up from her prize at the guard.
"The doctors are still trying to determine, but they think another heart attack likely."
She nodded. Yes, that made sense--it would be his third in the last year, after all.
Much as she would have liked to gaze on it forever, she knew what was expected of her. She folded the cloth back around the circlet and handed it back to the guard. "Is my uncle still in his room?"
"Yes, Lady."
She nodded again. "You may inform my husband and Princess Nolani now or wait until the official announcement in the morning as it pleases you. I will go sit with him now."
The guard nodded. "As you will, Lady."
She swept past him. She kept the smile off her face as she glided down the empty hallways towards her uncle's room.
She had, at long last, won.
7. Lonura
Every Time Around--Adam Pascal
But then, oh, once in a while, I make a breakout.
Always under fire, but I never mind the end.
Every time around you don't make a sound.
Every time around is a chance to love her.
Dreaming far away, every time around.
See, it's only love.
God, it's only love.
986 FY
Lonura took the woven flower-bracelet off of the tanbur's tuning peg. The princess had left her here just a few minutes ago, after making her promise to come meet her for a private dinner that night.
She knew full well where that was heading, of course--everyone knew that Princess Nolani's tastes were broad, and her driving fire required she indulge them with a string of quick, passionate romances. But she had never thought she'd achieve this so soon.
She'd come to court to escape the overwhelming pressure of the mountains and the loss of her parents, where her being the wrong kind of mage might benefit her, if used carefully. It hadn't taken her long to want to have a turn as Princess Nolani's favorite--the princess was beautiful, and charming, and clearly devoted to the people around her, for as long or as short a time as they were in her life. Lonura wanted, desperately, that kind of devotion.
But Nolani's favorite at the time had been Oluri, then Kodame, then Uteni, then Osinu, then Mikane, and...
And now Nolani was finally free and had chosen her.
And all it had taken was being in the right place at the right time, singing the right song.
Lonura carefully pulled the flower-bracelet onto her wrist, making sure not to break it. She picked up her tanbur and headed back to her room.
She still needed to decide exactly what to wear tonight to make sure this lasted.
8. Amassa
A Sentimental Man--Wicked
I am a sentimental man
Who always longed to be a father
That's why I do the best I can
To treat each citizen of Oz as son
Or daughter.
951 FY
Amassa sat down next to the solemn-eyed little girl. His sister's child, and more or less a stranger to him. Since he'd had five children of his own by the time she was born--Ulore being a few weeks her elder--and he'd been afraid she would remind him overmuch of his baby sister and he'd unconsciously blame her for that loss and in so doing hurt her, he hadn't objected when her father had wanted to take her to his own family's holdings, some distance away from the City.
They'd visited a few times--about once a year--since then, and he'd been relieved to know that any misplaced blame was either long-faded or easily ignored when talking with his precocious niece. It helped, he guessed, that she didn't look much like Messhuni had. But, even with that, he hadn't bothered to try and change the girl's living arrangements.
Now, with her arriving mere hours after notice of her father's untimely death, Amassa wished he had. He and Lesshura weren't unprepared to care for her in some ways--after all, they had five children of their own, all within five years of the girl's age--but they knew nothing about what kind of person she was. She was six now, old enough that knowing these things might make a large difference in how they cared for her.
But he'd come armed with an appropriately muted smile, a few books and toys appropriate for a child her age, and a cria. Small girls liked baby animals, and he did vaguely remember she liked being in charge of things--an animal she could raise would be perfect to help her adjust to a life so very foreign from anything she'd ever known.
She blinked up at him with those large, dark, solemn eyes, and quietly thanked him for the cria and the other gifts.
He sighed inwardly. Hopefully he'd be a half-decent substitute for the father she'd lost. He certainly intended to try.
9. Isshiri
Just Around the Riverbend--Pocahontas
I look once more
Just around the riverbend,
Beyond the shore,
Where the gulls fly free.
Don't know what for.
What I dream the day might send
Just around the riverbend...
986 FY
Isshiri stood for a long time at the peak of the mountain pass, after his escort from the City had left him--he would be crossing the border and making the rest of the journey to Feredar alone, since too much protection would undo all the work they'd put into his cover story. He could, probably, have taken one or two--merchants both in and out of the desert sometimes brought along guards or friends--but he didn't want to have to depend on someone else's lying if their story was questioned. He liked standing on his own, being self-reliant. And he knew exactly how far he could trust his own ability to lie, which, no matter how much he trusted or even cared for the guards who'd helped defend him since he was small...
Well, he couldn't know that.
Besides, if he'd brought them with him, they'd probably still be in We Must Protect Our Prince mode, and scold him for staying so long and so still on the mountaintop like this. And it was true, it was kind of a stupid risk to take, even (or maybe especially, depending on who came upon him) holding a slightly-glowing ball of heat. And his mission was on something of an urgent timescale--exactly how much of one he wouldn't know until he reached the city proper.
But standing here, with the wind in his face, surrounded by the effortless, enchanting, exciting, unachievable, unknown mountaintops, dreaming of what the new world at their feet might hold for him...
This was priceless. This was why he'd agreed to what could well turn into a one-way trip. This freedom, this exhilaration, this basking at the edge of the unknown in all its glory.
He let out the breath he'd been holding, and smiled. Whatever the waiting world might throw at him, this made it all worthwhile.
10. Postwar
Gold--Linda Eder
My heart's been driven by extremes,
Blind with dreams, tight with fear.
But still, God knows that I was here
And I was so alive.
1002 FY
Kesshare
Isselu had been born in Feredar.
This irked Kesshare considerably. Nolani's first claim should be to the City of Glass, as her birth nation and the one where she had higher rank and more power. Besides, she'd discovered the pregnancy while here at home.
True, the child himself had a higher rank in Feredar than he did in Glass, but that was no excuse. Nolani shouldn't have left the desert when she had, about four months into her pregnancy, when it would likely be too dangerous for her to attempt to re-cross the mountains after a visit with her husband. She should have remained until her delivery, and then gone back to her husband's home once she and the child were strong enough after.
Of course, his father and his ministers would likely have the exact opposite complaint if Nolani had done what her mother wanted, but Kesshare didn't particularly care. Her daughter's relative positions--and her own--demanded nothing less.
And now Kesshare would have to wait to see her grandson, the child through whom she would--without having to waste time, money, and blood on a conquest--gain her the empire of her dreams.
Nolani had done well in her marriage, and that dream was certainly secure since the first child had been a son, but Kesshare still tasted bitter defeat in that the soon-to-be-defunct independent government of Feredar had won this first, important battle against her.
Ineku
Ineku had been given permission to go visit Nolani during the last month of her pregnancy--Kesshare and Kirana both had duties at home they couldn't extract themselves from, and Isshiri would likely wander in once he heard, all the way whatever unknown place he was currently exploring, but there was no telling when that would be. And, as furious with Nolani as Kesshare was, she'd understood that their daughter might want at least one member of her family present, and Ineku had certainly made sure she knew how much he wanted to be there when his first grandchild was born.
He found that, here, people treated him very...oddly. He had no doubt that this was so at least in part because marriages between mages and non-mages had been illegal in Feredar until very recently, and, unlike their king, he had accepted his spouse for reasons well beyond political necessity. Part of it might be that he was so willing to come here, despite everything this city had done to his son. Part of it also might be that they were surprised that Kesshare allowed her consort to leave her borders. Other than Nolani, no consort here had been allowed to leave Feredar's territory in centuries.
It might even have something to do with his obvious acceptance of Lady Lonura and her relationship with his daughter--they had travelled here together--when such things were not done in Feredar. Or, at least, if adultery was committed, it was far more discreet than his daughter and Lonura were willing or able to be.
And yet...it was that, out of this whole trip (apart from holding his grandson for the first time, of course) that gave Ineku the most joy. Seeing Nolani, who had suffered through so much, worrying about Isshiri while he was missing, then arguing with and breaking things off with Lonura, then all she'd suffered in her difficulty having the child everyone in the world hoped for and demanded of her, happy. Simply, purely happy, surrounded by her husband and her favorite and her child.
That image, that joy, was one he would cherish for the rest of his life.
Riluke
In her seventeen years representing her people to the Islands, Riluke had built up a substantial information network. Some of it was perfectly legal and above-board. She corresponded with her family, of course, including some of Nolani's surviving in-laws. She'd struck up friendships and eventually correspondences with ambassadors from the various other countries who had been replaced since her arrival, and their families. Isshiri often wrote her from any number of exotic places, and included letters from writers, artists, philosophers he thought she might enjoy. She maintained her relations even with Taz Hantree and Dallu, locked away in the North where few people had sources.
Some of it, of course, was less than legal. She had a network of well-placed, highly paid secret informants. At least one in every major court, at least one among the middle or lower classes of every major city, and a few extras here and there, where she'd been able to cultivate the relationships. She was fairly sure that her aunt was aware of this network--whatever Riluke thought of Kesshare personally, and whatever she'd had to put up with as a bastard, she had a strong sense of loyalty and duty towards her nation and the Crown. She shared information frequently, and the Queen was never surprised to hear some tidbit of vital importance that Riluke could never have uncovered honestly.
So it was no surprise to her when her official dispatch packet was thicker than usual. Nolani's son had been born six days ago, and her information travelled much faster than the official kind.
What the packet did mean, of course, that she could now pass on Nolani's announcement to Lord Kit and talk openly about her personal joy at this new addition to her family.
And, more importantly, she could finally write Nolani and share with her the exact same thing.
Nolani
He was finally here.
After so many years of trying and hoping and praying and failing and grieving and despairing, he was finally here.
And he was perfect.
He had all the right numbers of limbs and eyes and ears and fingers and toes. He was fairer than she was, but darker than his father, with dark hair and eyes with lashes so long she was afraid to touch them, afraid that they'd be so long they'd collapse under their own weight combined with her hand, and fall into her perfect little son's perfect little eyes.
He was a boy--that would please Mother, and she and Andrell were happy if only because the names they'd picked for a boy were closer related than the names they'd finally settled on for a girl. Isselu and Istell started with nearly the same sound, and had the same meaning--strength is joy. He'd wanted to name a daughter after her mother, and the closest-sounding name she could find--Nedari--had a meaning with no relation to it. She accepted it, of course, since he'd wanted to name his first daughter for his mother so desperately, but it meant a lot to her that her child's names were the same thing, with the same start, just told through different eyes. Just like his rank. Just like his family.
But, more than his names, more than his sex, more than the fact that he was finally, finally in her arms after nine years and nine months of waiting, Nolani was glad that he was perfect.
Isshiri
Isshiri flew into a panic when he finally received Nolani's letter, more than six months after it had been sent to him. It wasn't her fault, or the messenger's fault, or even his--he'd been travelling in mostly unoccupied areas in the northernmost parts of the continent. He'd even tried wandering the glaciers once or twice, as difficult as that could be. Of course, he sent word home as to where he was every few weeks, and the letter had pursued him from stop to stop, but he was always weeks and weeks ahead of it.
Dear Isshiri,
I hope this gets to you in time, and I hope you're well, wherever you are. You know I miss you, always, but we've had that argument more times than I can count, and I don't really want to get into it again here. But, wherever you are, I hope you're well, and safe, and with someone who can help keep you that way.
But most of all, I hope this letter gets to you quickly, because I have news, and it's amazing, and time-sensitive, and...
(Please don't laugh, but a tiny part of me is afraid that as soon as I actually write this down, I'll wake up and it will all have been a dream.)
I'm pregnant.
Isshiri, I'm finally pregnant. I'm about two months along, and you're the first person outside of Mother and Andrell who I've told. I don't know if they've told anyone else yet. But I haven't even told Lonura yet. I wanted you to be the first to know after the people I have to tell for reasons of dynastic and legal logic. ...well, my doctors know, obviously, and probably Kira, but that's different.
Anyway, I really, really want you to be there when I have my child. I'm due sometime in April, and it would mean the world to me if you could come.
So, I hope you get this in time, and are safe and well enough to come. I look forward to seeing you.
Much love,
Nolani
It was the second-to-last day of March.
Isshiri had just gotten the letter this morning.
He threw together only those things that were absolutely necessary, left hurried orders to forward the rest to him, and started off across the plains.
Fortunately, the sheer joy of the wildness of his ride cut through his panic and guilt at maybe not getting there in time to be with his sister for such an important day.
Unfortunately, he had to trade horses frequently, and wasn't stopping nearly enough for his own well-being. But Nolani had always--always--been there when he needed her most, and he couldn't possibly fail her now.
He finally fell off his last horse in the Palace courtyard two hours after Isselu was born.
He wasn't exactly able to help the way he'd hoped, but he'd made it. At last.
Kirana
Kirana had kept a firm silence every time she was asked when Nolani's child would be born, if it would be healthy, if it would be a boy or girl. All she would say was that the child would be born alive.
This didn't stop the questions, of course. Nolani begged to know if her child would be healthy, Andrell awkwardly included his own letters in her sister's, Mother tried to trick her into telling the sex of the child.
Mother's attempts were faintly ridiculous, since Kirana almost always saw them coming.
But Kirana tolerated them, and simply replied with her standard answer--the child will be born alive. She'd long since learned that too much information, especially about politically sensitive matters, often did more harm than good. Besides, the only thing Nolani wanted to know was if the child would be healthy. It would absolutely be wrong to share any more information than that with anyone other than the child's parents, if they asked. And if she decided to tell even them.
The one silence she had broken was when Andrell had written to her of his own accord, without an accompanying letter from Nolani, which was a first. He hadn't asked directly about the child, but he had asked if she knew if Isshiri would be there. It had been nearly three months since Nolani had written him at the time, and she was frantic with worry at his silence.
Kirana had scried for that, and said that Isshiri was well, and safe, and would come as soon as he got the letter. Exactly when he would arrive was up to too much chance--it depended on weather patterns, for one thing, which she never had got the hang of predicting more than a few days out. Probably because they relied so much on elements too far removed from her native fire. But he would be there sometime the week of the birth.
Andrell had even written back, thanking her briefly for that reassurance. She hadn't heard from him since, but she was grateful for that little courtesy. Especially since she knew it hadn't been easy for him--she seemed to set him on edge even more than most other mages.
She watched the clock, smiling, and counting down the seconds until her nephew took his first breath.
Lonura
Despite all her old jealousies, Lonura found herself growing fond of Nolani's husband. Far from stealing her beloved away, he was trying to learn how to work with her, and had no objections to her sharing his wife's suite when Nolani visited Feredar with her--provided, of course, that she made herself scarce when he spent the night. It probably helped that, as friendly as he was towards Nolani, he didn't actually love her, and Nolani felt roughly the same for him.
But, even so, given the feelings of his people--especially since she was now open about her magic--she was grateful for his support. It was hard enough sharing Nolani, hard enough visiting her here in the place that hated them both, without the kind of animosity she'd thought she'd get from him. And, when they were in Glass, since he could never leave his home, she fulfilled all the social and political functions of being the Crown Princess's consort.
He'd even specifically requested she be with Nolani while she was in labor, since the customs of his people said he couldn't be. She, and Ineku, and an exhausted Isshiri when he finally arrived, were a handful of friendly faces around Nolani, breaking the flurry of officials and midwives and doctors and all the other unnecessary people who were there for a royal birth.
She sang softly to her beloved, and, when Isselu--when Istell--was born, how she felt was indescribable. Such a child, after so many years of waiting, and Nolani was so happy, and Lonura...
She had never seen a child so young, so small. She felt the music of the world curl around her, adjusting to him.
She felt closer to Nolani than she ever had before, through all the years of worry and sex and love and fighting.
And, when Andrell came in to meet his son, he took her hand, wanting her to stay.
For the first time since her parents' deaths decades before, Lonura felt like part of a family.
'Verse: Feredar
Colors: Emerald #11. There is no good or evil: only power and those too weak to seek it., TARDIS Blue #22. The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa the bad things don’t always spoil the good things and make them unimportant., Dogwood Rose #8. coral: desire
Supplies and Materials: portrait, mixed media, canvas (Amassa, his wife and children, Ineku, Isshiri, Riluke, and Kirana), frame (Kesshare, Nolani, postwar), oils, feathers, chalk, yarn, glitter ("Make a list of things you want."), novelty beads ("Fresh Blood", The Eels; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4Qp1TEKswQ&ob=av2e)
Word Count: 5084
Rating: R
Characters: Amassa and his wife and children, Kesshare, Ineku, Nolani, Isshiri, Kirana, Lonura
Warnings: References to the events of Sending a Message, character death (violent and nonviolent), implied disowning, implied murder, implied sex with consensual BDSM, arranged/forced marriage, glee at a familial death, references to parental death, stigma towards bastards, use of a sexist slur, war viewed from a distance, references to infertility, implied homophobia, violence towards children
Notes: Constructive criticism welcome, as always. My last Emerald prompt. These are organized in an attempt to have them flow musically into one another. I don't know exactly how well it worked, but that was the goal. Image sources for the covers: front, back. This took for-freaking-ever and is why I haven't posted anything in the last week or so. ...This and end-of-semester type stuff.
Download here
1. Amassa's Wife and Children
Protège-moi--Placebo
Sommes-nous les jouets du destin
Souviens-toi des moments divins
Planant, éclatés au matin
Et maintenant nous sommes tous seuls
960 FY
Queen Lesshura sighed faintly, watching her middle son. "No. We're not doing that."
"Mother, this is the first time Lidare will be home for our birthday in years," he pleaded. "And both of us are so far down in the succession that it hardly--"
"You may not leave the country, and that's final. And don't try going over my head to your father," she cut him off. "I've already spoken to him and he agrees with me."
He pouted. "Just to the mountains, not even over the border, please?"
Lesshura closed her eyes and counted to ten. "Your father wants you both here. I'm sorry."
976 FY
Ulore snarled something obscene under his breath. That bitch Kesshare was planning something, he just had no idea what. The others agreed with him--Lidare told him to stay out of it, quiet spineless priestess that she was. Mina wanted him to wait before acting, wait until they knew more. She and Odaki had the most to lose, she with her husband and he with his brat.
But Ulore couldn't stand for that. He might have the least to lose of all his siblings, being the youngest and unattached to either person or temple, but he sure as hell wasn't going to let that bitch Kesshare walk all over him.
And she needed to know that.
Ulore felt a little sick inside at what occurred to him. That bitch Kesshare had kids, and he was sure they figured into whatever move she was planning. Going for one of them would be the most disruptive, would buy him and his siblings a little time.
The problem was, he actually liked the kids, sort of, as much as he liked any kids or anyone connected with that bitch Kesshare. And the only one likely to be alone was Isshiri, and he was like six or something.
Ulore closed his eyes. It's down to my family or hers. And I have to go with mine.
979 FY
Crown Princess Minalu smiled at the note her husband had left on her vanity that morning. He liked little sweet gestures like that, made a point of making them as often as he could. He seemed to feel a need to prove that he hadn't married her just for her rank.
Not that she'd ever thought he had, but such things mattered to him.
She folded the note up and slipped it up her sleeve and stepped out the door.
She made it three steps before the floor gave way beneath her.
982 FY
It had been getting steadily worse for months, the disorientation. Lidare had to make every move slowly, so slowly or risk falling. There were some days she was too dizzy even to get up.
So far, she'd managed to keep it from her father and brother--living here at the temple helped, and her fellow priests and priestesses had agreed, if reluctantly, to keep her condition secret--but she knew she couldn't much longer. Especially since she was expected in the capital next month for an extended visit.
She closed her eyes, bracing herself against her doorframe and waiting for the room to settle itself around her. Dear gods, please let me be well at home.
985 FY
Odaki was smiling as he left his meeting with his father. The two of them worked well together, had settled into a comfortable rhythm in the six years since he'd become Crown Prince. He was sure that he would be a good King when the time come--though, hopefully, if there was any luck in the world, that wouldn't be for many, many years.
He had married, six months ago, because he'd had to--a forward-going succession was always more stable than a sideways one. And if he outlived his cousin Kesshare, her children were still a few steps away from the throne. If only Riluke could...
But that would never be.
He sighed. At least Riluke and the half-siblings he hoped she would have before too long would be distant enough in age that they were unlikely to feel any kind of sibling rivalry.
Or, at least, he devoutly hoped so.
2. Kirana
World Without End--Bernstein
World without end
Whispers of living, echoes of warning
Patterns of laughter at the edges of mourning
World without end spins endlessly on
979 FY
Kirana dreams of a time of darkness and despair.
She can't quite put what it is that the dream is into words, only knows that very bad things are coming. They're far enough out that she can't say exactly when they’ll come true, so she doesn't share the dreams the way she usually does.
But there is a man in the shadows, with blood on his hand. A sparkling-eyed lady laughs and laughs at the slaughter. A dark woman and the man who is as opposite to her as can be forge a pathway through the destruction.
And Kirana's beloved brother Isshiri is crying.
She is very, very glad that she almost never sees those dreams.
3. Ineku
Bad Romance--Lady Gaga
I want your drama
The touch of your hand
I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand
I want your love
963 FY
Ineku woke before Kesshare the morning after their wedding. He stretched carefully, not wanting to disturb her.
He wondered how long they'd been asleep--the air still smelled of smoke and sex, so it couldn't have been too long.
He didn't try to wake her, though he probably could have and a part of him wanted to oh how I want to but...
The arrangement he and Kesshare had made had been one that utterly mystified his family, especially his brother. Kesshare was known to like fire- and blood-sports in her bedroom play, and, more importantly, the children wouldn't be Loquelin. In most families--at least in his part of Glass--extended family duties and relationships went to both families, even if the poorer or lower-ranked partner married into the wealthier one's family and took that family name. As Utoki had pointed out repeatedly since Ineku had accepted Kesshare's proposal, between the distance, and the royalty, and the magic...there wouldn't be much of a bond between them and their Loquelin relatives.
Ineku sighed. He had known it would never be easy, married to a woman like Kesshare, but he knew he would never be happy with anyone else.
4. Riluke
I'm Still Here--Treasure Planet
I am a question to the world,
Not an answer to be heard.
All a moment that's held in your arms.
985 FY
The house Riluke been given for her residence while representing her grandfather here in the Islands was amazing, in its way. She'd been here three days, and she still felt startled every time she opened her eyes in the morning, or walked in from outside, at the sheer amount of wood there was. Wood paneling, wood furniture, wooden ornaments and moldings...a house like this, back home, would cost more than even her grandfather was worth.
But it was different here. There were trees everywhere, it seemed.
Riluke smiled to herself. It was beyond her wildest hopes, from when she'd had to leave home. Everything was turned on its head here. What was precious beyond imagining at home was a readily available--if still vital and therefore valuable--building material here. And at home, she was an extra family member, ineligible for any sort of real power. Here? Here she was one of the most powerful women in the country by virtue of that same exact position.
But, then, it wasn't just here that that was true. Kesshare and her grandfather had to choose to send her here. Like Isshiri, through no fault of her own, she was valueless to the family in any traditional sense.
Riluke's smile widened, as she traced the graceful curve of one of her bedposts, feeling the way wood had a different smoothness from the glass she was used to.
Like the wood, she was worthless in one place and priceless in another. Like Isshiri, in having no value, her worth was incalculable.
And like both and neither of them, she knew exactly how to capitalize on her value. Riluke had absolutely no interest in trying to take the throne from her cousins. But that didn't mean she had any intention of being a lesser power in the world. And here, in the Islands, with their beautiful, plentiful wood...
Here she had a chance.
5. Nolani
Too Much--Spice Girls
Too much of something is bad enough,
But something's coming over me to make me wonder,
If too much of nothing is just as tough,
I need to know the way to feel to keep me satisfied.
993 FY
Nolani had been in Feredar for three days, but she had yet to speak to her prospective husband. They had an odd custom here, where, no matter how close they were or how they'd come to be engaged, a married couple couldn't see one another for a week before the wedding. The people handling most of the planning would have much preferred it if she hadn't arrived until the morning of the Event, but she'd of course left plenty of extra time for her trip in case of weather or trouble with blocked mountain passes or in the still-not-quite-settled countryside. However, as luck would have it, she'd ended up travelling much faster than expected. So they could just deal with her being early.
But she wished she could've seen or spoken to or even written to Andrell--apparently letters were also Not Done--because the longer she stayed cooped up in here the more afraid she was of the wedding tomorrow.
Not because there was a very good chance someone would try very hard to kill her or Andrell or both. Not even because Isshiri was here and might get caught up in the crossfire.
It was stupid--there was no way in the universe Andrell could back out of the wedding and not show up--but since she and Lony had fought over the wedding and they weren't together anymore...
Nolani was afraid of being alone.
6. Kesshare
Everybody Loves You Now--Billy Joel
All the people want to know your name
Soon there will be lines outside your door
Feelings do not matter in your game
Yeah, 'cause nothing's gonna touch you anymore
997 FY
Kesshare was roused from a sound sleep well before dawn one night in the hottest part of the year. "What is going on?" she asked. "Is the palace under attack?"
"No, Lady," the guard said. He knelt on the glass floor and presented her with a wrapped package.
This is it, she thought. All I've worked for all these years. Slowly, with no trace of shaking in her hands, she unfolded the cloth.
And there it was, in all its pristine, unaffected glory.
The clear-glass circlet of the Monarch.
"How did it happen?" she asked, without looking up from her prize at the guard.
"The doctors are still trying to determine, but they think another heart attack likely."
She nodded. Yes, that made sense--it would be his third in the last year, after all.
Much as she would have liked to gaze on it forever, she knew what was expected of her. She folded the cloth back around the circlet and handed it back to the guard. "Is my uncle still in his room?"
"Yes, Lady."
She nodded again. "You may inform my husband and Princess Nolani now or wait until the official announcement in the morning as it pleases you. I will go sit with him now."
The guard nodded. "As you will, Lady."
She swept past him. She kept the smile off her face as she glided down the empty hallways towards her uncle's room.
She had, at long last, won.
7. Lonura
Every Time Around--Adam Pascal
But then, oh, once in a while, I make a breakout.
Always under fire, but I never mind the end.
Every time around you don't make a sound.
Every time around is a chance to love her.
Dreaming far away, every time around.
See, it's only love.
God, it's only love.
986 FY
Lonura took the woven flower-bracelet off of the tanbur's tuning peg. The princess had left her here just a few minutes ago, after making her promise to come meet her for a private dinner that night.
She knew full well where that was heading, of course--everyone knew that Princess Nolani's tastes were broad, and her driving fire required she indulge them with a string of quick, passionate romances. But she had never thought she'd achieve this so soon.
She'd come to court to escape the overwhelming pressure of the mountains and the loss of her parents, where her being the wrong kind of mage might benefit her, if used carefully. It hadn't taken her long to want to have a turn as Princess Nolani's favorite--the princess was beautiful, and charming, and clearly devoted to the people around her, for as long or as short a time as they were in her life. Lonura wanted, desperately, that kind of devotion.
But Nolani's favorite at the time had been Oluri, then Kodame, then Uteni, then Osinu, then Mikane, and...
And now Nolani was finally free and had chosen her.
And all it had taken was being in the right place at the right time, singing the right song.
Lonura carefully pulled the flower-bracelet onto her wrist, making sure not to break it. She picked up her tanbur and headed back to her room.
She still needed to decide exactly what to wear tonight to make sure this lasted.
8. Amassa
A Sentimental Man--Wicked
I am a sentimental man
Who always longed to be a father
That's why I do the best I can
To treat each citizen of Oz as son
Or daughter.
951 FY
Amassa sat down next to the solemn-eyed little girl. His sister's child, and more or less a stranger to him. Since he'd had five children of his own by the time she was born--Ulore being a few weeks her elder--and he'd been afraid she would remind him overmuch of his baby sister and he'd unconsciously blame her for that loss and in so doing hurt her, he hadn't objected when her father had wanted to take her to his own family's holdings, some distance away from the City.
They'd visited a few times--about once a year--since then, and he'd been relieved to know that any misplaced blame was either long-faded or easily ignored when talking with his precocious niece. It helped, he guessed, that she didn't look much like Messhuni had. But, even with that, he hadn't bothered to try and change the girl's living arrangements.
Now, with her arriving mere hours after notice of her father's untimely death, Amassa wished he had. He and Lesshura weren't unprepared to care for her in some ways--after all, they had five children of their own, all within five years of the girl's age--but they knew nothing about what kind of person she was. She was six now, old enough that knowing these things might make a large difference in how they cared for her.
But he'd come armed with an appropriately muted smile, a few books and toys appropriate for a child her age, and a cria. Small girls liked baby animals, and he did vaguely remember she liked being in charge of things--an animal she could raise would be perfect to help her adjust to a life so very foreign from anything she'd ever known.
She blinked up at him with those large, dark, solemn eyes, and quietly thanked him for the cria and the other gifts.
He sighed inwardly. Hopefully he'd be a half-decent substitute for the father she'd lost. He certainly intended to try.
9. Isshiri
Just Around the Riverbend--Pocahontas
I look once more
Just around the riverbend,
Beyond the shore,
Where the gulls fly free.
Don't know what for.
What I dream the day might send
Just around the riverbend...
986 FY
Isshiri stood for a long time at the peak of the mountain pass, after his escort from the City had left him--he would be crossing the border and making the rest of the journey to Feredar alone, since too much protection would undo all the work they'd put into his cover story. He could, probably, have taken one or two--merchants both in and out of the desert sometimes brought along guards or friends--but he didn't want to have to depend on someone else's lying if their story was questioned. He liked standing on his own, being self-reliant. And he knew exactly how far he could trust his own ability to lie, which, no matter how much he trusted or even cared for the guards who'd helped defend him since he was small...
Well, he couldn't know that.
Besides, if he'd brought them with him, they'd probably still be in We Must Protect Our Prince mode, and scold him for staying so long and so still on the mountaintop like this. And it was true, it was kind of a stupid risk to take, even (or maybe especially, depending on who came upon him) holding a slightly-glowing ball of heat. And his mission was on something of an urgent timescale--exactly how much of one he wouldn't know until he reached the city proper.
But standing here, with the wind in his face, surrounded by the effortless, enchanting, exciting, unachievable, unknown mountaintops, dreaming of what the new world at their feet might hold for him...
This was priceless. This was why he'd agreed to what could well turn into a one-way trip. This freedom, this exhilaration, this basking at the edge of the unknown in all its glory.
He let out the breath he'd been holding, and smiled. Whatever the waiting world might throw at him, this made it all worthwhile.
10. Postwar
Gold--Linda Eder
My heart's been driven by extremes,
Blind with dreams, tight with fear.
But still, God knows that I was here
And I was so alive.
1002 FY
Kesshare
Isselu had been born in Feredar.
This irked Kesshare considerably. Nolani's first claim should be to the City of Glass, as her birth nation and the one where she had higher rank and more power. Besides, she'd discovered the pregnancy while here at home.
True, the child himself had a higher rank in Feredar than he did in Glass, but that was no excuse. Nolani shouldn't have left the desert when she had, about four months into her pregnancy, when it would likely be too dangerous for her to attempt to re-cross the mountains after a visit with her husband. She should have remained until her delivery, and then gone back to her husband's home once she and the child were strong enough after.
Of course, his father and his ministers would likely have the exact opposite complaint if Nolani had done what her mother wanted, but Kesshare didn't particularly care. Her daughter's relative positions--and her own--demanded nothing less.
And now Kesshare would have to wait to see her grandson, the child through whom she would--without having to waste time, money, and blood on a conquest--gain her the empire of her dreams.
Nolani had done well in her marriage, and that dream was certainly secure since the first child had been a son, but Kesshare still tasted bitter defeat in that the soon-to-be-defunct independent government of Feredar had won this first, important battle against her.
Ineku
Ineku had been given permission to go visit Nolani during the last month of her pregnancy--Kesshare and Kirana both had duties at home they couldn't extract themselves from, and Isshiri would likely wander in once he heard, all the way whatever unknown place he was currently exploring, but there was no telling when that would be. And, as furious with Nolani as Kesshare was, she'd understood that their daughter might want at least one member of her family present, and Ineku had certainly made sure she knew how much he wanted to be there when his first grandchild was born.
He found that, here, people treated him very...oddly. He had no doubt that this was so at least in part because marriages between mages and non-mages had been illegal in Feredar until very recently, and, unlike their king, he had accepted his spouse for reasons well beyond political necessity. Part of it might be that he was so willing to come here, despite everything this city had done to his son. Part of it also might be that they were surprised that Kesshare allowed her consort to leave her borders. Other than Nolani, no consort here had been allowed to leave Feredar's territory in centuries.
It might even have something to do with his obvious acceptance of Lady Lonura and her relationship with his daughter--they had travelled here together--when such things were not done in Feredar. Or, at least, if adultery was committed, it was far more discreet than his daughter and Lonura were willing or able to be.
And yet...it was that, out of this whole trip (apart from holding his grandson for the first time, of course) that gave Ineku the most joy. Seeing Nolani, who had suffered through so much, worrying about Isshiri while he was missing, then arguing with and breaking things off with Lonura, then all she'd suffered in her difficulty having the child everyone in the world hoped for and demanded of her, happy. Simply, purely happy, surrounded by her husband and her favorite and her child.
That image, that joy, was one he would cherish for the rest of his life.
Riluke
In her seventeen years representing her people to the Islands, Riluke had built up a substantial information network. Some of it was perfectly legal and above-board. She corresponded with her family, of course, including some of Nolani's surviving in-laws. She'd struck up friendships and eventually correspondences with ambassadors from the various other countries who had been replaced since her arrival, and their families. Isshiri often wrote her from any number of exotic places, and included letters from writers, artists, philosophers he thought she might enjoy. She maintained her relations even with Taz Hantree and Dallu, locked away in the North where few people had sources.
Some of it, of course, was less than legal. She had a network of well-placed, highly paid secret informants. At least one in every major court, at least one among the middle or lower classes of every major city, and a few extras here and there, where she'd been able to cultivate the relationships. She was fairly sure that her aunt was aware of this network--whatever Riluke thought of Kesshare personally, and whatever she'd had to put up with as a bastard, she had a strong sense of loyalty and duty towards her nation and the Crown. She shared information frequently, and the Queen was never surprised to hear some tidbit of vital importance that Riluke could never have uncovered honestly.
So it was no surprise to her when her official dispatch packet was thicker than usual. Nolani's son had been born six days ago, and her information travelled much faster than the official kind.
What the packet did mean, of course, that she could now pass on Nolani's announcement to Lord Kit and talk openly about her personal joy at this new addition to her family.
And, more importantly, she could finally write Nolani and share with her the exact same thing.
Nolani
He was finally here.
After so many years of trying and hoping and praying and failing and grieving and despairing, he was finally here.
And he was perfect.
He had all the right numbers of limbs and eyes and ears and fingers and toes. He was fairer than she was, but darker than his father, with dark hair and eyes with lashes so long she was afraid to touch them, afraid that they'd be so long they'd collapse under their own weight combined with her hand, and fall into her perfect little son's perfect little eyes.
He was a boy--that would please Mother, and she and Andrell were happy if only because the names they'd picked for a boy were closer related than the names they'd finally settled on for a girl. Isselu and Istell started with nearly the same sound, and had the same meaning--strength is joy. He'd wanted to name a daughter after her mother, and the closest-sounding name she could find--Nedari--had a meaning with no relation to it. She accepted it, of course, since he'd wanted to name his first daughter for his mother so desperately, but it meant a lot to her that her child's names were the same thing, with the same start, just told through different eyes. Just like his rank. Just like his family.
But, more than his names, more than his sex, more than the fact that he was finally, finally in her arms after nine years and nine months of waiting, Nolani was glad that he was perfect.
Isshiri
Isshiri flew into a panic when he finally received Nolani's letter, more than six months after it had been sent to him. It wasn't her fault, or the messenger's fault, or even his--he'd been travelling in mostly unoccupied areas in the northernmost parts of the continent. He'd even tried wandering the glaciers once or twice, as difficult as that could be. Of course, he sent word home as to where he was every few weeks, and the letter had pursued him from stop to stop, but he was always weeks and weeks ahead of it.
Dear Isshiri,
I hope this gets to you in time, and I hope you're well, wherever you are. You know I miss you, always, but we've had that argument more times than I can count, and I don't really want to get into it again here. But, wherever you are, I hope you're well, and safe, and with someone who can help keep you that way.
But most of all, I hope this letter gets to you quickly, because I have news, and it's amazing, and time-sensitive, and...
(Please don't laugh, but a tiny part of me is afraid that as soon as I actually write this down, I'll wake up and it will all have been a dream.)
I'm pregnant.
Isshiri, I'm finally pregnant. I'm about two months along, and you're the first person outside of Mother and Andrell who I've told. I don't know if they've told anyone else yet. But I haven't even told Lonura yet. I wanted you to be the first to know after the people I have to tell for reasons of dynastic and legal logic. ...well, my doctors know, obviously, and probably Kira, but that's different.
Anyway, I really, really want you to be there when I have my child. I'm due sometime in April, and it would mean the world to me if you could come.
So, I hope you get this in time, and are safe and well enough to come. I look forward to seeing you.
Much love,
Nolani
It was the second-to-last day of March.
Isshiri had just gotten the letter this morning.
He threw together only those things that were absolutely necessary, left hurried orders to forward the rest to him, and started off across the plains.
Fortunately, the sheer joy of the wildness of his ride cut through his panic and guilt at maybe not getting there in time to be with his sister for such an important day.
Unfortunately, he had to trade horses frequently, and wasn't stopping nearly enough for his own well-being. But Nolani had always--always--been there when he needed her most, and he couldn't possibly fail her now.
He finally fell off his last horse in the Palace courtyard two hours after Isselu was born.
He wasn't exactly able to help the way he'd hoped, but he'd made it. At last.
Kirana
Kirana had kept a firm silence every time she was asked when Nolani's child would be born, if it would be healthy, if it would be a boy or girl. All she would say was that the child would be born alive.
This didn't stop the questions, of course. Nolani begged to know if her child would be healthy, Andrell awkwardly included his own letters in her sister's, Mother tried to trick her into telling the sex of the child.
Mother's attempts were faintly ridiculous, since Kirana almost always saw them coming.
But Kirana tolerated them, and simply replied with her standard answer--the child will be born alive. She'd long since learned that too much information, especially about politically sensitive matters, often did more harm than good. Besides, the only thing Nolani wanted to know was if the child would be healthy. It would absolutely be wrong to share any more information than that with anyone other than the child's parents, if they asked. And if she decided to tell even them.
The one silence she had broken was when Andrell had written to her of his own accord, without an accompanying letter from Nolani, which was a first. He hadn't asked directly about the child, but he had asked if she knew if Isshiri would be there. It had been nearly three months since Nolani had written him at the time, and she was frantic with worry at his silence.
Kirana had scried for that, and said that Isshiri was well, and safe, and would come as soon as he got the letter. Exactly when he would arrive was up to too much chance--it depended on weather patterns, for one thing, which she never had got the hang of predicting more than a few days out. Probably because they relied so much on elements too far removed from her native fire. But he would be there sometime the week of the birth.
Andrell had even written back, thanking her briefly for that reassurance. She hadn't heard from him since, but she was grateful for that little courtesy. Especially since she knew it hadn't been easy for him--she seemed to set him on edge even more than most other mages.
She watched the clock, smiling, and counting down the seconds until her nephew took his first breath.
Lonura
Despite all her old jealousies, Lonura found herself growing fond of Nolani's husband. Far from stealing her beloved away, he was trying to learn how to work with her, and had no objections to her sharing his wife's suite when Nolani visited Feredar with her--provided, of course, that she made herself scarce when he spent the night. It probably helped that, as friendly as he was towards Nolani, he didn't actually love her, and Nolani felt roughly the same for him.
But, even so, given the feelings of his people--especially since she was now open about her magic--she was grateful for his support. It was hard enough sharing Nolani, hard enough visiting her here in the place that hated them both, without the kind of animosity she'd thought she'd get from him. And, when they were in Glass, since he could never leave his home, she fulfilled all the social and political functions of being the Crown Princess's consort.
He'd even specifically requested she be with Nolani while she was in labor, since the customs of his people said he couldn't be. She, and Ineku, and an exhausted Isshiri when he finally arrived, were a handful of friendly faces around Nolani, breaking the flurry of officials and midwives and doctors and all the other unnecessary people who were there for a royal birth.
She sang softly to her beloved, and, when Isselu--when Istell--was born, how she felt was indescribable. Such a child, after so many years of waiting, and Nolani was so happy, and Lonura...
She had never seen a child so young, so small. She felt the music of the world curl around her, adjusting to him.
She felt closer to Nolani than she ever had before, through all the years of worry and sex and love and fighting.
And, when Andrell came in to meet his son, he took her hand, wanting her to stay.
For the first time since her parents' deaths decades before, Lonura felt like part of a family.