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rainbowfic2013-03-19 08:58 pm
dark_kana) wrote in rainbowfic2013-03-19 08:58 pm
Alice Blue 24 - Angel Cake 17 - Acanthus 6 - Glitter - Novelty beads
Name: Kana
Title: Bad news
Story: Circle never ends
Characters: Freya, Nick
Colors: Alice Blue 24. I don't know the meaning of half those long words, and I don't believe you do either - Angel Cake 17. Obedience - Acanthus 6. Peering Knife
Supplies and Styles: Glitter (I need you – Tim McGraw) – Novelty Beads (Underneath)
Word count: 807
Rating: PG13
Summary: The doctor telling Freya the cancer is back
Notes: Constructive criticism is, as always, welcome
"Freya."
The tone of his voice is enough warning.
"I'm really sorry. I really am. But..."
The doctor takes a deep breath, and subconsciously she does the same.
"The cancer is back."
She had expected it. Of course she had. Had felt it.
"I know..."
Freya doesn't notice the surprised look on the man's face. And it doesn't really matter. She had felt it. She knew her body. She still knew how it felt. Hasn't forgotten it. Will never forget it.
Only vaguely she hears the doctor speaking again. The same words as years ago. She hears it, but it doesn't register. It doesn't matter. Not really. Not now. Not again.
"Do you understand Freya."
She nods. Still having that faraway look in her eyes. Not caring if the doctor sees it or not. After all, she knows what is going to happen. She knows everything. She knows it still...
-
The tears escape as soon as she closes the door to her apartment. She doesn't want to be alone. For the moment she really doesn't want to be alone. And yet she doesn't want company either. People acting and pretending to be alright, expecting the same of her. But she can't. Not for the moment. The strength and will to fight - and later, perhaps, the indifference - will return. She's a fighter and she will not give up until she has beaten this. Again.
She nearly jumps up from her couch when she hears her cell phone ringing. There are but a few people who knew. But a few people she would expect to bother her now. She already warned her family. She already called Susan. There is only one other she had to inform. But she's afraid for the conversation. She's afraid hearing his voice and the concern and the love, will make her break.
Still she picks up. She's not that cruel.
"Hey Nick."
It surprises her that her voice isn't breaking. It didn't even shiver.
"How are you?"
He doesn't ask how it went. Just needs to know if she's okay. It makes her feel special.
"I'm ok. As for as I can be..."
Of course he hears what she doesn't say.
"Want me to pass by or do you want to be left alone?"
For a second she is tempted to tell him not to worry and to stay away. But...
"I could do with a hug..."
"I'm on my way."
The tears fall down as soon as she hangs up.
-
"So, chemo?"
She nods. Hands brushing away the tears that are rolling down. His arm still around her shoulder. They are sitting next to each other on the couch. Freya leaning against his side, letting her head rest against his chest while he holds her close.
"When?"
A soft sniffle.
"As soon as possible. The doctor wants to start tomorrow already, but..."
Eyes closed she wonders - not for the first time - if she'll be able to handle this. If she will survive this.
"I already told you. I'm telling you again. I'm going to depend on you. Terribly much even. I can't do this alone Nick. I just..."
The soothing noises he makes while running his fingers through her hair is enough to make her stop.
"I know. And don't worry. I'll be here. You know I will be. I will not leave you alone to fight this. We will beat it together."
It's a comment that makes her smile. And they stay silent for a while. Both trying to get a grip on themselves.
"When does it start?"
Freya smiles. He knows her too well.
"Monday. I first want... This week. And the weekend. He had to allow me that. If he got his way, we would have started tomorrow. Hell, even today..."
She stays in his arms a little while longer. Before sitting up again. Smiling reassuringly at him.
"Dinner?"
Nick chuckles softly and nods. "I'd love to."
Freya walks over to the kitchen. Not blaming him for staying on the couch a little while longer, trying to re-order his thoughts.
It are but a couple of minutes later when he walks into the kitchen, placing a hand on her hip while watching her cut the vegetables. His chin resting on her shoulder.
"Can I help?"
She shakes her head. A careful movement so he wouldn't pull away.
"Laying out the table in some minutes. Other than that, there is not much work..."
Freya shivers when she feels his soft lips in her neck. His breathing hot on her skin. She thinks she hears him whisper a silent "I love you." before he pulls away and takes the plates out of the cupboard.
She already knows he'll accompany her to the first chemo. It needn't be said nor asked. He'd be there. No matter what...
Title: Bad news
Story: Circle never ends
Characters: Freya, Nick
Colors: Alice Blue 24. I don't know the meaning of half those long words, and I don't believe you do either - Angel Cake 17. Obedience - Acanthus 6. Peering Knife
Supplies and Styles: Glitter (I need you – Tim McGraw) – Novelty Beads (Underneath)
Word count: 807
Rating: PG13
Summary: The doctor telling Freya the cancer is back
Notes: Constructive criticism is, as always, welcome
"Freya."
The tone of his voice is enough warning.
"I'm really sorry. I really am. But..."
The doctor takes a deep breath, and subconsciously she does the same.
"The cancer is back."
She had expected it. Of course she had. Had felt it.
"I know..."
Freya doesn't notice the surprised look on the man's face. And it doesn't really matter. She had felt it. She knew her body. She still knew how it felt. Hasn't forgotten it. Will never forget it.
Only vaguely she hears the doctor speaking again. The same words as years ago. She hears it, but it doesn't register. It doesn't matter. Not really. Not now. Not again.
"Do you understand Freya."
She nods. Still having that faraway look in her eyes. Not caring if the doctor sees it or not. After all, she knows what is going to happen. She knows everything. She knows it still...
-
The tears escape as soon as she closes the door to her apartment. She doesn't want to be alone. For the moment she really doesn't want to be alone. And yet she doesn't want company either. People acting and pretending to be alright, expecting the same of her. But she can't. Not for the moment. The strength and will to fight - and later, perhaps, the indifference - will return. She's a fighter and she will not give up until she has beaten this. Again.
She nearly jumps up from her couch when she hears her cell phone ringing. There are but a few people who knew. But a few people she would expect to bother her now. She already warned her family. She already called Susan. There is only one other she had to inform. But she's afraid for the conversation. She's afraid hearing his voice and the concern and the love, will make her break.
Still she picks up. She's not that cruel.
"Hey Nick."
It surprises her that her voice isn't breaking. It didn't even shiver.
"How are you?"
He doesn't ask how it went. Just needs to know if she's okay. It makes her feel special.
"I'm ok. As for as I can be..."
Of course he hears what she doesn't say.
"Want me to pass by or do you want to be left alone?"
For a second she is tempted to tell him not to worry and to stay away. But...
"I could do with a hug..."
"I'm on my way."
The tears fall down as soon as she hangs up.
-
"So, chemo?"
She nods. Hands brushing away the tears that are rolling down. His arm still around her shoulder. They are sitting next to each other on the couch. Freya leaning against his side, letting her head rest against his chest while he holds her close.
"When?"
A soft sniffle.
"As soon as possible. The doctor wants to start tomorrow already, but..."
Eyes closed she wonders - not for the first time - if she'll be able to handle this. If she will survive this.
"I already told you. I'm telling you again. I'm going to depend on you. Terribly much even. I can't do this alone Nick. I just..."
The soothing noises he makes while running his fingers through her hair is enough to make her stop.
"I know. And don't worry. I'll be here. You know I will be. I will not leave you alone to fight this. We will beat it together."
It's a comment that makes her smile. And they stay silent for a while. Both trying to get a grip on themselves.
"When does it start?"
Freya smiles. He knows her too well.
"Monday. I first want... This week. And the weekend. He had to allow me that. If he got his way, we would have started tomorrow. Hell, even today..."
She stays in his arms a little while longer. Before sitting up again. Smiling reassuringly at him.
"Dinner?"
Nick chuckles softly and nods. "I'd love to."
Freya walks over to the kitchen. Not blaming him for staying on the couch a little while longer, trying to re-order his thoughts.
It are but a couple of minutes later when he walks into the kitchen, placing a hand on her hip while watching her cut the vegetables. His chin resting on her shoulder.
"Can I help?"
She shakes her head. A careful movement so he wouldn't pull away.
"Laying out the table in some minutes. Other than that, there is not much work..."
Freya shivers when she feels his soft lips in her neck. His breathing hot on her skin. She thinks she hears him whisper a silent "I love you." before he pulls away and takes the plates out of the cupboard.
She already knows he'll accompany her to the first chemo. It needn't be said nor asked. He'd be there. No matter what...
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She has. An awesome family. That I have been neglecting a little bit in favor of Nick... *sweatdrop* I'll bring them in the picture again soon though. ^^